Oh Great Throat Virus/Bacteria/Germ I Bow To Thee

Let's face it, I am at the mercy of something 3000 times smaller than me [if you know me, then you'll know i'm talking about something really tiny]
I don't know what it is, but i just want it to know - I surrender!
It's happened maybe a hundred times since childhood, but each time it's just as bad. It starts with a rash in the throat. Early morning, one feels like a good gargle will do the trick. But the gargle is just a bloody waste of hot water boiled on costly LPG.
Then comes the self assuring Strepsils phase. How i wish a weird tasting red/orange/green toffee sold as medicine would help me, but it's an addiction; one just can't help it.
A sore throat without tulsi ki chai is like Baywatch without Pamela Anderson. But then it doesn't really help much.
I pray to my throat and the WBC [white blood corpuscles], do your job men! But all they can do is make me cough.

Then comes the bad part, even a glass of harmless water make one think twice. Am i that thirsty, do i really need to feel the stinging sensation each time i swallow. Why cant they just make a makeshift tube that bypasses the throat.
Bloody fools, keep sending people to the moon and fucking robots to Mars to find ice and here i am sucking on useless Strepsils wondering whether i should drink water!
What is there on Mars that interests them more than finding a cure to the common cold and the more common sore throat.?
Well, in my mood of frustration, i cant even yell at the idiotic scientists of the world, but i do get majorly pissed at the NASA guy who claims he found ice on Mars; when here i am unable to drink the basic liquid my body needs - water!

By mid afternoon i've had at least a litre of the famed miraculous tulsi ki chai! But alas, the germs are still on a rampage. Just when i feel that all is lost and the situation can't get worse, i realize that all is not lost and that i could lose more and the situation could get worse. The thermometer reads 102, the wonderful Crocin is then shoved down my agitated throat.

Fortunately Crocin is like Angelina Jolie in Lara Croft, it does it's job really well.
Then I start watching an episode of House MD and pray to God that I don't have one of the House special diseases which just can't be detected until the very end. Secondly I dont have a House MD type doctor in Pune.

People seem to be awfully nice when you are sick. I wonder if it is the irritating noise of the throat clearing which attracts them in hordes. Maybe it's the smell of Vicks Vapourub that is more powerful than the Axe Effect, which makes women just lunge for me and give me a hug. If only it worked on Hot Women! Maybe my fever makes me hot [having thought about it, it actually does make me hot, but i dont enjoy it as much as when i am normal]

Eventually the Throat Enemy finally has pity on me, I realize that somehow something worked. Haven't ever figured out what exactly it is that works, but Mom always thinks its the tulsi ki chai [i never tell her that i give most of it to the poor Money plant in my balcony] ;)

Maybe if the brains of the world would have some more time off from hunting ice on Mars they'd find a cure for the running noses and aching throats of this world... but until then I'll readily drink tulsi ki chai and enjoy the new flavors of Strepsils [latest flavor was pineapple... yummy!]