Tuesday, January 27, 2009

The All Knowing Virgins

It happens to everyone, friends meet up... strike up a conversation. If ever, the group is all guys, invariably the topic drifts to "the facts of life". That's when everyone seems to be an expert at that one particular topic. Guys seem to know so much about the girls, it's weird!

If most guys are to be believed, "girls want it a lot more than guys"! Now I've heard this millions of times and while the truth of the statement is subject to research work for which I would love to dedicate some more time, I really don't know how so many historically single guys [I mean guys who've never had girlfriends] know so much! Where is all this knowledge coming from?

Also, there are the 'pustaki pundits', as in people who've read so much about this stuff that they're good to go! It's like, they've read Herbert Schildt completely and they're ready to redefine Java, the only thing they lack is a workspace!

But the best part is when there is a congregation of girls and guys and in the rare occasions when that topic is broached accidentally by an unsuspecting guy. For e.g. Last week, there were a few of us and we were discussing a very famous Indian Female Tennis Star [we all know who she is] and her victory in the 1st round of the Australian Open. Now this guy unfortunately didn't have a good tennis vocabulary or a very good "you-know-what" vocabulary. So when one girl who is on her way to becoming a feminist [lol] and a huge fan of the said Indian Female Tennis Star, was describing her powerful play in the 1st round match, one bechara guy [lol, again] vociferously agrees with her and then says the following words - "I was watching that live and her powerful foreplay was the best part" :D

The feminist got offended, we all laughed and the poor guy was embarrassed. Now for those rarest of the rare people who didn't get the joke, he wanted to compliment the Indian Female Tennis Star's "powerful forehand", but alas he got it all wrong!
No offense to the Indian Female Tennis Star [in case by some miracle if you read this blog... I'm a huge fan of your powerful forehand too :P ]

Anyways, the point is that... well there is no point; I haven't blogged in quite a while now and this incident just came to my mind, so now we have yet another useless blog post!

It's surprising how easy it is to talk about "that", without ever using any words directly referring to "that". My close friends would do well to remember some of my very famous and elaborate metaphors like "The Gulab Jamun Principle" about which I won't blog, coz it's fun to keep a metaphor secret between close friends!


Shantanu said...

good one bro! :) foreplay incident is cool! reminds me of anothr incident whn one of my frnds hd been to IIT powai for tech fest...a guy came to him and askd 'whr is the contraception stall?' ....he ws lik 'Whaaaaat???they hv a freakin' contraception STALL!!' ....it took him several moments to realise tht the guy meant to ask abt contraption aftr all and not contraception :D

on a 'serious' note, it really is the law of nature...u always tend to kno more abt 'stuf' b4 u actually 'do' it...bcz once u do it, u stop talkin and concentrate on the 'job' at 'hand' (no puns intended watsoever ;))

Shreyash said...

I guess no-girlfriend-in-life guys acquire knowledge about "girls want more THAT as compared to boys" from girlfriend-wala guys...
And that contraception thing is hilarious :D

Tapan said...

great post dude