Harshvardhan Pande

Agneepath - Poem by Harivansh Rai Bachchan

2012-01-30T01:41:00.000-08:00

Any poem that can kindle a fire in the hearts of millions over several decades has to be considered an epic. It has also inspired two massive Bollywood productions, but that is a lesser achievement for a poem that is so simple in its concept and yet so great in its scope. It can be applied to any situation where one's soul goes through a trial by fire. One can only marvel at the genius of the great Harivansh Rai Bachchan for composing this epic, inspirational poem.

Vriksh hon bhale khade,

Hon bade, hon ghane,

Ek Patra chhah bhi,

Maang mat, Maang mat, Maang mat.

Agneepath! Agneepath! Agneepath!

Tu na jhukega kabhi,

Tu na mudega kabhi,

Tu na thamega kabhi,

Kar shapath, Kar shapath, Kar shapath.

Agneepath! Agneepath! Agneepath!

Ye Mahaan Drushya Hai,

Chal Raha Manushya Hai,

Ashru, Shwed, Rakta Se,

Lathpath, Lathpath, Lathpath.

Agneepath! Agneepath! Agneepath!

- Harivansh Rai Bachchan

Agneepath - Movie Review - Bollywood at its Best

2012-01-26T09:04:00.000-08:00

If you are a fan of classic Bollywood masala fare, then Agneepath is a must watch! It's been a really long time since I saw a proper Bollywood blockbuster and watching Agneepath was an awesome experience. It felt so good, watching a movie in a packed theater, with the audience stunned into silence at times, breaking into applause and collectively gasping and hooting during some knockout scenes.

If you've followed the media hype or watched the original Agneepath, you would know that the story is an out and out revenge drama. So I won't bother getting into the story.

First let's get done with the comparisons to the old movie. I felt that the original movie was a very flawed movie. The scenes between Amitabh and Danny were brilliant and the rest of the movie fell flat. It was almost as though the director had thought through the Kaancha vs Vijay sequences very thoroughly and did not care too much about the rest of the movie. Story wise, the original had more than enough masala to become a blockbuster, but unfortunately it did not come through. Despite that, it is remembered for one of Amitabh's defining performances and as one of the few movies where Danny Denzongpa got his due as the stalwart that he is.

The new Agneepath is, well, a new Agneepath. It is not a scene by scene recreation, it is a very different movie. What it does very well, is use the basic plot of the original - the story of the wronged Vijay Dinanath Chauhan, who is driven into a world of crime because of the pure evil of Kaancha. But that is where the similarity ends. Some of the characters from the old movie have been discarded and rightly so. The one's that have been retained, have been shaped in such a way that one simply can not compare them to the original movie characters. They are completely new avatars and brilliant ones at that. And there are a few new characters added to the script.

Kaancha, played by Sanjay Dutt at his menacing best, is one of the greatest on-screen villains in terms of screen presence. The movie director, Karan Malhotra has used Sanjay Dutt's immense physical stature to add to the power of the character. The carefully constructed evil look, adds value to the role and Sanjay Dutt brings on his most devilish smirk onto the big screen in a role that you can clearly see, he enjoyed performing.

Rauf Laala, is a depraved villain; played with delightful intensity by Rishi Kapoor. This one is a maverick, casting masterstroke and adds an insane amount of value to the movie. You can see how much fun Rishi Kapoor has had playing this character, especially during the celebration song that is picturized on him. One would never have imagined Rishi Kapoor playing the kind of character he plays in the movie and mouthing some of the most filthy dialogues any villain can ever say on screen (in terms of concepts). Hats off to the man, for getting into the skin of the character and surprising us yet again, even after spending four decades in the industry.

Vijay Dinanath Chauhan. From the trailers it seemed to me that Hrithik Roshan would underplay the character to avoid comparisons with Amitabh Bachchan. I even feared that his role would end up being overshadowed by the two villains. But... Hrithik Roshan delivers yet another knockout performance, elevating his acting in the most crucial scenes. His rendition of the legendary line 'Pura naam, Vijay Dinanath Chauhan, baap ka naam, Dinanath Chauhan, Gaon Mandwa' is the high point of the movie and showcases how Hrithik and the director choose to redefine the character while retaining some of the trademarks. That one scene, first stunned the theater audience and then got them clapping. Pure brilliance.

The movie is three hours long but does not seem to drag on at any stage. The action sequences are powerful. Not because there are too many explosions happening, shot from different camera angles or any other technical breakthroughs in filming. The action scenes work because of the points where they come into the story. The battle between Vijay and Rauf Laala, takes place against a backdrop that completely drives you to root for Vijay and hate Rauf Laala. You want him to beat the hell out of the perverse villain.

The climactic battle between Kaancha and Vijay. Well, lets just say hats off to the action director Abbas Ali Moghul. Everyone in the theater knew that the movie would end with the face off between the two super stars. The entire movie is just a build-up to the climax fight and expectations are sky high and the movie delivers. The set pieces make for an awesome visual experience. The art direction for Kaancha's haveli is top notch and at the very end of the movie, when Hrithik delivers the Agneepath poetry, everyone in the theater was awestruck. Hrithik's performance exceeded everyone's expectations.

It's not just those scenes, right through the movie, especially in the short emotional sequences between Vijay and his mother or the scenes with his sister, Hrithik expresses the pain of his character wonderfully and increases the empathy the audience feels for Vijay.

This movie will surely go onto become a colossal box office success, it may also win Hrithik, Sanjay Dutt and Rishi Kapoor awards for Best Actor, Best Villain and Best Supporting Actor at next year's Filmfare awards. The director deserves a lot of applause and credit for delivering the quintessential Bollywood blockbuster to the audiences after a long time. Agneepath... Agneepath... Agneepath!

Those Three Words...

2012-01-24T19:36:00.000-08:00

Those three words... aah, the passion they convey. Every man dreams of hearing those words from his lover. The sentiment, the raw innocence and honesty in them. The ecstasy and thrill of hearing those words. There is no other equivalent. No other feeling comes close to hearing those three words escape the lips of your lover... fuck me harder!

At a wedding

2012-01-23T06:58:00.000-08:00

There are different kinds of weddings -

Friend Weddings

Family Weddings

Then of course there's Your Own Wedding; but at that time you're torn between fake-smiling at random guests, listening to and following instructions given by every old aunty and the pundit, along with fantasizing about the suhaag raat when there's time for that.

Friend Weddings - can be fun if you've got a good collection of other friends to hang out with. You don't really get to spend anytime with your actual friend whose getting married, because his/her mind will be occupied with what was written in the previous paragraph.

The most fun I have had at a 'Friend Wedding' has been while sitting around with other friends, making fun of all the relatives at the wedding.

Another thing I noticed is that, all families are the same.

There's always a talkative, know-it-all uncle/aunty who keeps pestering the bride's/groom's parents, who have to tolerate them for social reasons.

There's always at least one really, insanely hot chick who struts around in a shiny green/blue dress.

There's always this moment at the end of the reception where the bride/groom are surrounded with friends who crack the non-veg, suhaag raat based jokes. I think the only reason that friends are invited to weddings is for this brief period of laughter that they contribute to the couple's life.

Family Weddings -

There's always someone who has a complaint about the food.

There's always some relative who you've never seen before but claims to have seen you when you were two feet tall (a measure that is also referred to as 'jab tu itna saa thaa')

There's always some relative who wants to know your entire resume. This type can be easily detected by looking out for people who ask the following question - 'toh aaj kal kya kar rahe ho?'

You will always hear the phrase 'arrey tum kitne badey ho gaye ho', even if you've stopped growing a decade ago. That phrase is damn irritating, especially if you are a short person. You always wonder if there's a tinge of sarcasm involved.

If you're tall, then the phrase changes a little to 'arrey tum toh badey hotey jaa rahey ho'

On a related but slightly random note. Imagine the scene if Pamela Anderson were Indian. At a wedding, if she's told 'arrey tum toh aur badi hoti jaa rahi ho'!

Back to the post...

There's always this gang of old aunties singing, who sound like a cross between Anu Malik and Nusrat Fateh Ali Khan, both, on dope.

The songs sung during these occasions are the one's pulled out of the playlist used by All India Radio's Bhoole Bisre Geet. If you were born post-independence, there's a high chance you will not remember any of them.

You will lose count of how many feet you have touched.

There will once again be a very hot chic at the wedding. But here's the main difference between a Friend Wedding and a Family Wedding. At a Friend Wedding, you are free to shamelessly ogle at women, but at a Family Wedding, it is not so safe, because there is a high chance that the said female may turn out to be a very distant cousin. Which is kinda scary!

Let me end this pointless post with a crass joke:

Q - Why do all the guests have a weird smile on their face when greeting the bride/groom at a wedding?
A - Coz they know you're gonna get fucked soon!

See you at the next wedding!

Cinema Paradiso - Movie Review

2012-01-14T05:12:00.000-08:00

I have never seen a movie as honest and powerful in its emotions as Cinema Paradiso!

The story is so simple and yet complex, that it's impossible to explain.

Cinema Paradiso tells the story of a man called Salvatore Di Vita a.k.a. Toto and his deep friendship with the city's movie hall projectionist Alfredo!

The movie is set in the post World War II era - Toto is a bright, mischievous young kid who lives with his mother and sister. He knows that his father is dead even though his mother clings on to the hope that her husband would return someday. In such a situation, Alfredo becomes a father figure for Toto as their friendship deepens with time.

Alfredo realizes that Toto is a very intelligent kid and could do greater things in his life than become a projectionist in a small town. All through Toto's developing years, Alfredo tries to encourage Toto to ensure that he does not get satisfied with a simple small town life. Alfredo's sentiment is best portrayed by the following quote he says to Toto:

"I don't want to hear you talk anymore. I want to hear talk about you..."

The movie also showcases one of the best ever portrayals of cinematic romance when Toto falls in love with a girl in his town, named Elena. Even today, the scenes will touch your heart and remind you of your first love.

The last twenty minutes of the movie are a study in how silence can sometimes be the best dialogue in a film.

The movie ends with a very moving sequence that is brilliantly enacted by Jacques Perrin, who plays the older version of Toto. But frankly speaking, the acting in the movie right through is brilliant. Phillipe Noiret as Alfredo is spectacular, while Salvatore Cascio, who plays the child version of Toto is fantastic. Marco Leonardi who plays the adolescent version of Toto and Agnese Nano who plays Elena, the girl who steals Toto's heart - do a brilliant job of establishing their special bond as lovers despite very simple sequences. Their romance is the definition of the term on-screen-chemistry.

Hats off to writer-director, Giuseppe Tornatore, who, a decade later gave us the wonderful movie - Malena. And word of praise for a perfect background score which carries the last 20 minutes of the movie by the legendary Ennio Morricone.

The movie won the Oscar in 1989 for Best Foreign Language Film, once you watch the movie, you will know why!

Rockstar Movie Review - aka WTF Just Happened!

2011-11-13T04:09:00.000-08:00

If you've already seen the movie and somehow liked it, then don't read on. If however, you saw the movie and got mind fucked by the random trash on display, then I hope my words do justice to your anger and disappointment.

This year end, we've had three hyped up movies - Mausam, Ra. One and Rockstar coming out back to back and turning out to be incredibly bad movies. Let's focus on Rockstar.

The trailers promised an awesome visual and musical treat. The music release thankfully gave Rehman fans what they were promised, but the movie sadly was like watching a disaster unfold. The first twenty minutes were fine, barring the lousy performance by Nargis Fakhri, an epic casting fail by Imtiaz Ali. She is actually 32 yrs old, playing a Kashmiri girl attending a Delhi college and she totally does not look or act the part. In fact in several scenes she seems to be aping Katrina Kaif's acting (i.e. non-acting) skills. There's a lot of humor in those first twenty minutes, which succeeds in entertaining the movie goers.

Then comes a lot of epic bullshit. The director/editor chooses layers of flashbacks for a story where a linear narrative would've sufficed. By the end of the movie, one gets to watch the same footage of Ranbir and Nargis on a bike travelling in Kashmir, at least half a dozen times. WTF!

Some major pain points that I have with this movie are as follows:

1. The movie trailers that usually setup one's expectations from the movie showed a very different viewpoint from what the movie actually turned out to be.

2. Ranbir's character, who at one point in the movie is shown to be ridiculed by some existing Rock band for his lack of charisma, all of a sudden is being sought after by 'Platinum Records'. Why? No explanation.

3. The reasoning for him being thrown out of his home is so trivial, and the thread with him and his bhabhi who's 'chipakne vaala' behavior is an unnecessary thread which goes nowhere.

4. His altercations with the media and the cops are totally contrived and make you feel no sympathy for the lead character.

5. The scene where Ranbir is arrested by the cops in Prague is shoved in so randomly that one is pissed off with the director. Here's what the audience gets to see. Nargis is sleeping at night, when she hears an alarm sound off. She rushes downstairs and gets out of her house to watch her husband point a gun at Ranbir. This, by the way, happens just a brief while after the husband and his family encourage her to partake in a music show with Ranbir and everything seems hunky dory. Definitely a very bad build up for a gun-pointing sequence.

6. The song Sadda Haq was touted as a rebel's song, in the movie there is no rebellious act that Ranbir does. Not a single one. His altercations with the cops are a direct result of him skipping out on shows he was supposed to play at or trespassing into Nargis' home in Prague. The Free Tibet (with Tibet being blurred) flags seem to have no consequence to the story. Neither are the random images of Kashmiri's raising their fists when the song is played. It just seems shoved into the story to make one feel like the character is a major rebel and the people are connecting with him.

7. This one single scene got a unanimous WTF sigh from the entire crowd at Adlabs: Bang in the middle of the song Sadda Haq, Ranbir stops singing and walks right into the middle of the crowd. The following words are exchanged (probably not verbatim, but close enough):

Jordan (Ranbir's Rockstar name): Bahut samay pehle, is jagah ek jungle hua karta thaa. Us jungle ko hataa kar yahaan ek shehar banaa. Us vakt ek parindon ka jhund ud ke chalaa gaya. Kya kisi ne un parindon ko dekha hai?

Audience: Nahiiii!

Jordan: Main un parindon ko dhoond raha hoon!

Audience: Yaaaay!

Then the rest of Sadda Haq plays on!

Another WTF moment! The guy is basically a gifted musician who has a fucked up love life. That's it! He isn't looking for any Parindaas in the whole god damn movie. He's just running after a girl who is massively confused about her own relationships. Why the fuck was that scene shoved in for no reason apart from trying to put in pseudo intellectualism into the movie!

8. Some more WTFs in the movie. At the end of the movie, when one finds out that Nargis is dying from some disease, there is a male character who mostly seems like her dad, but then turns out to be her doctor! Nargis' sister initially turns up at Ranbir's show when Nargis is on the verge of dying and gets the two of them close again. That leads to Nargis' health improving. Then, Nargis and Ranbir have implicit sex. She returns home and after some time goes into coma. Ranbir then gets a call from Nargis' sister asking whether he impregnated her sister. By this time, I saw about twenty people walk out of the movie.

Ranbir then walks out of another show without performing and arrives at the hospital. Where the sister, who until now was a major supporter of Ranbir in Nargis' life, says some random dialogues like "Tum zindagi bhar jalte rahoge" and other over the top lines as he is taken away by the police (for bailing out on yet another concert, not for any rebellious act). He also gets into rows with the media, when they ask him questions about his relationship with Nargis, who they know is a married woman. He thrashes some media dude. Again, no rebellion going on here.

The movie ends in a major WTF climax, where there is a montage of songs that Jordan plays on stage. Including one in which he imagines Nargis with him on stage, at which time the audience gave a reaction that reminded me of the scene in Kites where Hrithik jumps into the ocean to find Barbara Mori swimming to him in a bridal dress. It was that fuck all a scene!

Then, without any explanation, you get to hear Katiya Karun, for the billionth time in the movie with Ranbir and Nargis on the bike in Kashmir followed by the text "Written and Directed by Imtiaz Ali". Just in case you forgot whom to blame while walking out of the movie hall.

Now for the few things that were good about the movie:

1. Ranbir's performance. He was awesome in a fuck all movie. His expressions, attitude and screen presence were all amazing.

2. A R Rahman's background score. Simply stunning.

3. The cinematography.

That's about it. The thing about Rockstar was that everyone was trying their best to like the movie, but it just kept going downhill after the interval. Anyway, what's done is done. Those three hours of my life are never coming back. But in case anyone from Bollywood is reading this, please try and not fuck up movies with stellar star casts and production values. This year has been filled with hugely hyped up movies turning out to be utter bull shit. The only movie that set expectations right and then lived upto the hype was Zindagi Naa Milegi Dobara! More of the same, please!

Rockstar Music Review

2011-10-01T01:14:00.000-07:00

If a movie is titled Rockstar and the music credits go to A R Rahman, one has extremely high expectations. A lot of people say that A R Rahman over the past year or so has not been scoring music that is expected of him. I would agree, however even stuff that is not his best, is way better than the trash the others come up with.

The trailers of Rockstar were out a few weeks back and we were teased with tiny bits and pieces of what promised to be awesome songs. As the weeks leading up to the music release passed by, 'promo versions' of the songs were released. Hopes of millions of Rahman fans surged. And now, at long last, the music has been officially released. The verdict is: FIVE STARS!

If you haven't bought the album yet, please do so. This one deserves your money, don't go to a Pakistani website and download the album, it's disrespecting the genius of Rahman. Anyways, now for the business end of the music review:

The following songs are outstanding in an overall great album:

1. Sadda Haq - In-freaking-credibly awesome! The song has parts that are surreal, it is that good. The lyrics by Irshad Kaamil are farily impressive, the guitar work by Orianthi is phenomenal and Mohit Chauhan is brilliant right through the song. Sure shot winner for Best Song and Best Singer.

2. Kun Fayakun - It's one of those songs, you thank God you were alive to hear. I don't know think any other music director would experiment as much as Rahman has in this song. It has several threads. There's a segment between the 20th second and the 35th second of the song which goes back to the qawallis of the old days, but then the track and the tempo changes completely to what we hear of the song in the promo. The next thread of the song is when the guitar enters the qawalli along with the return of the harmonium, it's pure brilliance. After which the song returns to the chorus thread of Kun Fayakun.

But thats not the end of the song, we get to hear a completely different thread in the song which ends with the most random guitar chord progression which one would never ever expect in a quawalli, but Rahman pulls it off. This thread then beautifully ties back to the main chorus. By the end of the nearly 8 min song, you wish there were more threads. It's more than one song, its several songs in one with the base of a qawalli.

3. Tum Ho - My favourite song of the album, with Mohit Chauhan defining the meaning of longing with the first twenty seconds of the song. A beautiful composition that's surely going to be on my iPod forever.

There are several other songs in the album, which are incredibly good. The final one minute of Kateya Karoon is exceptional. Parts of Sheher Mein are brilliant, I can go on and on about bits and pieces of the other songs which are pure gold, but I won't go into each song explaining which part is awesome. Just get the album and a pair of headphone that can do justice to the music and lose yourself in the most brilliant album of the year. It'll sweep the awards this year.

There was this amazing comment I read on Youtube - "All the dislikes on the songs of Rockstar are by the other music directors"

I can not help but agree, how much they must envy Rahman; sure they can spin-off hit tracks every once in a while, but they do not posses his ability to push the boundaries of music. Thank you God, for giving my generation, A R Rahman!

Sucky ads - Rant for the month

2011-08-01T06:55:00.001-07:00

Dear ad-makers,

PFB a set of crappy ads you folks have been coming up with in the recent past:

1. A super crappy ad about a old hag who realizes after about 50 years that some Kantilal had made out with his chic and wants to take revenge, by breaking Mr. K's teeth. He says this to his teenage grandson. What a kick ass grandpa-grandson bonding moment!

The grandpa then finds Mr. K thanks to a social networking site accessed by his grandson's 3G device. They head off to take 'revenge', where the 'tharak max' grandpa gives a peck on the cheek to Mr. K's wife (without checking if she was his wife, in my twisted spoof version of the ad Mr. K will have the last laugh by telling 'tharaki grandpa' that the woman he kissed was his 'bai')

Tharaki grandpa then runs way past his grandson, jumping with joy, giving you the feeling that the ad could also be a confused 'musli power' type product ad.

2. Random guy asks a flop movie star a question, "Why is India's population so high?"

What follows is the most idiotic explanation of all time.

Apparently, when power cuts occur, men suddenly realize the lack of entertainment in their life due to the T.V. set not functioning. They then give 'havas' looks to their wives who comply and eventually get pregnant. Lo, behold, India's population explosion.

How do we prevent it? Condoms? Nope, just give everyone a particular brand of 3G service and then as the ad suggests, 'biwi se 3G'. They'll start watching porn on their mobiles all night and all is well.

The first ad is just downright stupid, the second is an insult to one's intelligence and a downright insult to women, shamelessly objectifying them as entertainment.

There are several other irritating as hell ads on TV, especially the one with the fat-ass with a beard who mouths a Hindi expletive every-time he watches sports in HD.

Such wannabe ads are increasing day by day, one wonders if ever intellect will make a comeback. TV shows had become unbearable years ago, the only time one watches TV is for sports and now even that experience is being destroyed by loud, insulting ads.

Dear ad-makers, you are the last hope of a generation that is in danger of abandoning the TV. Please don't assume that just because Delhi Belly became a hit, we want to hear abuses. Please don't try to make some non-funny ad seem funny by putting in fake laughter in the background (an insult to anyone who has seen Seinfeld). Please give us some proof that you haven't run out of ideas!

Just watch it!

2011-07-10T04:14:00.000-07:00

There was a time I would watch a movie and write a review, but now there's so little time and so much to do. So here I am, having watched "Super 8" and "Scott Pilgrim Vs The World" over the weekend asking you to just watch them both!

Why Facebook defeated Orkut

2011-05-07T11:50:00.001-07:00

You remember the days when people would count the number of scraps on their Orkut scrapbook. Some loser coders had even written code to "increase your scraps". People who used it were as dumb as the folks who actually open the "increase your size" type spam emails. Those were the glory days of Orkut. Communities of Sachin and Rahul Dravid constantly abusing each other and spamming the hell out of each other.

Then Facebook arrived, initially Orkut wasn't much affected, then the tide began to turn. By the time Orkut changed their entire look to mimic FB, you knew who was winning the war.

Now all the business related aspects aside, the real reason why FB won over Orkut was because of profile pics.

Most female junta on Orkut, would put up useless images like flowers, cartoons, cute babies etc as their profile pics but FB users would invariably put up their real pics.

Now one reason according to me for this change was, in FB the tagging process would allow anyone to upload a group photo and tag people. This would then make chics think that, what the hell, we're visible on some pics as it is, why not put up real photos on FB.

That is when the tide turned. All of a sudden you had everyone putting up their real pics on FB. Rarely would you find people with flowers or cute baby pics as their profile pics.

The one demographic that got totally bowled over by this feature was the 'letchers' who are a sub-category of the larger demographic of the 'perverts'. Any commercial venture has to win over this particular demographic if it wants to capture a market. Especially when it comes to utterly useless items like social networking sites (like Facebook) or deodorants (like Axe).

Earlier a pervert had to go through a lot of effort to get a good look at his favorite hot chic, now all one needed to do was go to Facebook, hope for some common friends and a not-too-protected profile and that's it. That is when Orkut went into life support and finally passed away sometime last year.

In a few years if you mention the word Orkut, people may think it was some extinct bird closely resembling an Ostrich. But at one time, it was the most frequently visited site for most college going folks. There may come a time, when I write a similar article on Facebook, but that would happen only if FB forgets its most loyal demographic - the loyal, humble pervert!

We are the champions, my friends!

2011-04-02T15:02:00.000-07:00

India, won the World Cup! We actually did it. One feels blessed to have seen this huge, monumental achievement by the Indian Cricket team.

This is a long long post, but I write this today on my blog, simply because somewhere down the line, a dream of mine has been fulfilled by a team which has my favorite cricketer as its batting mainstay and today the country as a whole can celebrate a dream come true.

My memory of cricket started with the Hero Cup match where Sachin Tendulkar bowled the over of his life to defend 6 runs against South Africa, but those were hazy memories, my real memories started from the 1996 Cricket World Cup, the India Pakistan Q/F match is etched in my memory, Ajay Jadeja hammering the hell out of Waqar Younis and Venkatesh Prasad showing Amir Sohail his place after the batsman lost his mind and gave TV channels, footage, which will embarrass his great grand children in the future.

But then I remember the 1996 World Cup Semi Final, against Sri Lanka. A brilliant fifty by Sachin and then the disaster that followed. I came very close to crying that night. I was too small to wonder, when India would get a chance to win the World Cup.

Post the 1996 World Cup, another major memory is of the 1998 Sharjah tournament. I remember being in Nainital on my summer vacation, watching Sachin Tendulkar create magical innings in two consecutive matches. He batted like a man possessed. He produced two of the finest innings one can witness. It was then that I became a life long fan of Sachin Tendulkar.

Then came the 1999 World Cup. It was one of the most lack luster World Cup performances by one of the most lack luster Indian teams. A team which had mostly mediocre players and a few budding greats like Saurav Ganguly and Rahul Dravid. Barring the victory against Sri Lanka and Pakistan, there was nothing much to talk about.

Then came the 2003 World Cup, India played some exceptional games, especially the one against Pakistan. One man stood out in the run chase, Sachin Tendulkar. He played the kind of innings, the greatness of which, cannot be valued in runs or the strike rate. Anyone who saw that match live, would know that the tag"Master Blaster" was owned by Sachin Tendulkar. That team was one of the strongest teams that India had in a long time.

Javagal Srinath was asked by Saurav Ganguly to come out of retirement for that World Cup and he did a fabulous job. I sincerely felt that India made a huge mistake by leaving out Anil Kumble from the 11 for the World Cup final. The bowling let us down that day, Sachin Tendulkar was dismissed very early and the run chase was just not on. Back then, it was already 4 World Cups for Sachin, the 2003 team was pretty strong, we just could not beat Australia.

Then came the 2007 World Cup, India went in with a team that promised a lot, but we got knocked out in the league stages itself. It was a shattering experience for Indian cricket fans. There is this footage of Sachin, Rahul and Anil Kumble; watching the proceedings; stunned as India collapsed and exited the World Cup!

What followed was carnage. People calling for Sachin Tendulkar's retirement. Ian Chappel famously wrote that "If Tendulkar had found an honest mirror three years ago and asked the question; "Mirror, mirror on the wall who is the best batsman of all?" It would've answered; "Brian Charles Lara." If he asked that same mirror right now; "Mirror, mirror on the wall should I retire?" The answer would be; "Yes."

As a Sachin Tendulkar fan and a supporter of the Indian Cricket team, I could not believe the things that people were saying at that time. Saurav Ganguly during that time said in an interview, when asked what he feels when people say that Sachin should retire he said "Log paagal ho gaye hain!" He actually said that.

Then came the turnaround of the decade, Sachin Tendulkar would go on to outscore all his contemporaries in terms of runs and centuries, the number of matches that India went onto win was insane. The ODI series in Australia being a fine example. It was our first ever ODI series win in Australia, one man scored a Century and a brilliant 90 odd in back to back finals. It was Sachin Tendulkar.

In 2010, the most unbelievable thing happened on a very normal February afternoon. The first ever double century in ODI men's cricket was scored, by, Sachin Tendulkar. The ardent fans, who had never doubted Sachin Tendulkar's greatness were vindicated. But even then, with 14 months to go, there was talk of whether he would retire without a World Cup medal in his cabinet.

It was a tough call, no host country had ever won a World Cup. The Indian bowling line up was not rated very highly, barring a phenomenally improved and brilliant Zaheer Khan and the not-in-the-best-of-form Harbhajan Singh.

India made it through the league stages, with more questions than answers, some disastrous collapses against England and South Africa, cost the team a win in both games. Zaheer's brilliance against England, resulted in a tie and his heroics against South Africa did not save the game, but gave a lot of hope to his fans for the remaining games. Another thing in common in both games was that one man had scored brilliant centuries, Sachin Tendulkar. In many ways, Zaheer was the bowling spear head and Sachin, nearing 38 years of age, was still our batting main stay.

Then came the most amazing 3 matches that India has played. The Quarter Final, the Semi Final and the Final of the 2011 World Cup. India on the back of some great bowling and significant batting contributions from the famed Indian batting line up, overcame the Australians. Ricky Ponting's century went in vain.

The win against Australia resulted in an epic Semi Final, India versus Pakistan. India had a record of winning all World Cup matches against Pakistan, one man was involved in all those games, Sachin Tendulkar. That man was dropped 4 times and survived the closest LBW review you will ever see followed by an extremely close stumping chance to score 85 runs, which turned out to be the highest score in that match. One would wonder if the good karma Sachin earned by walking in the previous games had caused so many lives to be granted to him in a semi final innings. India overcame a brilliant 5 wicket haul by Wahab Riaz to post a fighting total to defend. As was the case in all the past World Cup games between India and Pakistan, India won.

Shahid Afridi was extremely gracious and warm in his presentation ceremony talk. It was a nice touch to a closely contested game.

There was a lot of irritating talk of match fixing etc after the India Pakistan game. The lives given to Sachin and then Misbah's slow scoring rate during the run chase etc.

But all that talk was put to rest during the final of the World Cup, between India and Sri Lanka. People talked about Sachin's 100th International century. I worried about the result. Memories of 1996 haunted most of the fans of my generation.

What followed was one of the best World Cup finals ever. Sri Lanka scored 274 and India needed to chase down 275 to lift the World Cup at home. Only 2 times out of 9 had a team won the World Cup chasing. Never had a host team won on home soil. Sehwag got out without a run on the scoreboard. Hopes of millions sunk. Then came a flurry of runs from the blade of Sachin Tendulkar, hopes started to rise. Those hopes were short-lived, he made a mistake and got caught behind. At 31 for 2, there were very few who can claim not to have had a passing thought of a nightmarish situation, where India folded up for less than 150.

Then came some rebuilding by Gambhir and Kohli, just when things looked like they were settling, Kohli fell. Such was his disappointment that the man did not remove his pads and stood in the player's balcony for the remainder of the match, whether it was out of superstition or whatever the reason was, it showed how crucial victory was for even a member of the team, whose part in the game was effectively over.

Then came, Mahendra Singh Dhoni. I will be honest, I always had some issues with MSD. I felt that the man was simply lucky and got more than his due. I also was mad at him because Chennai Super Kings beat Mumbai Indians in the IPL final. But I sincerely swear, I have not seen a more commanding and critical knock by any captain in my lifetime than the one played by MSD. And man, if you are reading this by some miracle. I apologize for every thought in which I wrongly criticized you. You are truly a legendary captain and an all time great player. The man basically came in with a look on his face that personified determination. He looked more determined to win the World Cup, than he did during the T20 final or the IPL final, both of which he won.

There was a moment in the game, where someone commented that the game was basically boiling down to a face off between two wicket keeper captains. The big difference was the determination. MSD fought like a man who would wrench victory from fate's grip. Just by looking at him, one could sense that India would go onto win. In the course of an hour and a bit, he played an extra ordinary innings under pressure to eventually give India a comfortable victory in the World Cup final.

There was no swan-song for Murali, neither the 100th century for Sachin in a World Cup final. But there was a World Cup medal for him and World Cup for a billion. Against all odds, this team defied history, statistics, Sreesanth's bowling and a host of other challenges to win a World Cup.

Sachin Tendukar, aged nearly 38 in his 21st year of cricket can claim to be a member of a World Cup winning team. The man still ended up as India's highest run scorer in the World Cup. One quote sums up the feelings on an entire generation of Indians -

"Sachin carried the burden of the nation for 21 years. Now it's our turn to carry him!"

- Virat Kohli

Epilogue:

This photograph, is one of my favorites. It has two legends, Sachin Tendulkar and Anil Kumble. These two men, held up Indian cricket's flag high, during the darkest periods in the 1990s. Their heroics are worthy of song and one feels privileged to have witnessed the 10 wicket haul by Anil Kumble against Pakistan and the 200* by Sachin Tendulkar against South Africa, two of the most monumental individual achievements by any Indian bowler or batsman.

Kudos to MSD, blessed are we fans to have had the privilege of having a legendary batsman and a legendary captain of the World in the same cricket team.

Yeh Saali Zindagi - Movie and Music Reco

2011-02-06T08:23:00.000-08:00

This is not a movie review, it is a recommendation! Go watch this asap, don't even bother reading reviews.

2011 has started off in an awesome way in terms of movies from the Hindi film industry. I saw Dhobi Ghat and liked it. But when I saw it, I knew most people would not like it simply because it is not the mass entertained kind of movie.

I was expecting the same when I went for Yeh Saali Zindagi and to my surprise it turned out to be an awesomely entertaining movie. The late night show was housefull and people were clapping at dialogues and laughing at every witty line.

I wont go into the storyline but all I can say is, I am sure you will like this movie. It is a must watch. Irfan Khan gets the perfect role, he underplays it to perfection. Chitrangada Singh is so beautiful that you can actually believe that a man would go to the extent that Irfan goes, for a woman like that. She acts pretty well too and is a treat to watch in each frame.

Saurabh Shukla does really well in his role and his timing is amazing. The movie has so many bit roles that are given to very talented actors that you wish the movie was longer and one could see more of the other characters.

The real credit for this movie should go to Sudhir Mishra. He has made a brilliant movie, really entertaining for all audiences. The male and female characters in the movie are all super interesting and every second of the movie is worth watching.

The music, is perfectly used throughout the movie. The best songs of the movie are 'Dil-Dar-Ba-Dar', 'Kaise Kahein Alvida' and 'Yeh Saali Zindagi (Duet)'.

Please go and watch this movie if you haven't already. It is totally entertaining and fun.

David Flabbergaster strikes again

2010-11-07T10:28:00.000-08:00

David Flabbergaster finally found some time in his busy schedule to give us some more snippets from his random life. Hope you find these snippets interesting.

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Guy1: Have a Safe Diwali
David Flabbergaster: Yep, I make sure I always use a condom :P

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Girl completes a ride on a go-kart. At the end of it, some ppl ask her how she felt about it.

She says: It was OK, a little too short, I wish it would've been a little longer.
David Flabbergaster: That is the complaint of 90% of women in the world

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David Flabbergaster: While giving his opinion on two hot women who were identical twins - "Identical twins cannot be called identical twins, unless it is confirmed that they have identical twins."

Annie Hall and other Woody Allen Movies

2010-09-26T11:09:00.000-07:00

I had waited a long time to watch Annie Hall, I finally managed to watch it this weekend. What a movie! I have been a fan of Woody Allen movies since quite a while, of his recent movies I loved Match Point and Vicky Cristina Barcelona (no one casts Scarlett Johansson better than Woody Allen). Off late I have started to watch some of his initial movies and after watching and loving 'Bananas' and 'Everything you always wanted to know about sex but were too afraid to ask', I finally saw Annie Hall.

While Bananas and Everything... were random movies filled with non-stop gags, both had elements of awesome skill in terms of using new techniques and amazing dialogue. Annie Hall however is a more complete film, there is a proper story and well defined characters.

The story is about a neurotic comedian in New York called Alvy Singer, played by Woody Allen and his relationship with Annie Hall, played by Diane Keaton. The story revolves around the two of them and how their relationship pans out. Throughout the movie, we have amazing innovations in terms of cinematic technique, like breaking down the 'fourth wall' [where Woody Allen starts directly talking to the audience], split screens etc. These have been replicated in several movies but this particular movie uses it to awesome effect.

Another brilliant scene is the one where Annie invites Alvy to meet her family, here he has a conversation with her insane brother Duane, played by Christopher Walken.

Duane: Can I confess something? I tell you this as an artist, I think you'll understand. Sometimes when I'm driving... on the road at night... I see two headlights coming toward me. Fast. I have this sudden impulse to turn the wheel quickly, head-on into the oncoming car. I can anticipate the explosion. The sound of shattering glass. The... flames rising out of the flowing gasoline.

Alvy Singer: Right. Well, I have to - I have to go now, Duane, because I, I'm due back on the planet Earth.

Check out the brilliant scene here

The movie was a rage at the box office when it released, made at a modest budget of $4 million, it went on to gross nearly $40 million. It won Oscars for Best Picture, Best Actress [Diane Keaton], Best Director and Best Writer for Woody Allen. It was one of the rare comedy movies to win the Best Picture Oscar.

I will try to watch as many Woody Allen movies as I can asap. Meanwhile if you haven't seen any of his movies please do so. They are witty, dry, hilarious and entertaining movies to watch.

Completely Inappropriate Joke of The Day

2010-09-02T08:16:00.000-07:00

Q: What musical instrument can be used to best describe a blow job?
A: Mouth Organ

India's Progress

2010-08-06T00:01:00.000-07:00

More than any financial index. I think India's progress in the past few years can be best displayed by these two "then and now" images:

Then.

Now.

Condom Kab Kab, CWG Jab Jab

2010-08-02T12:56:00.000-07:00

This link made me coin the slogan 'Condom Kab Kab, CWG Jab Jab' :D

Sad, cheapo level stuff, but I had to put it on the blog :D. With all the trash related to the CWG on the net, this one takes the cake.

Inception - Movie Review

2010-07-16T14:51:00.000-07:00

A couple of years ago, around the same time of the year I saw a Christopher Nolan masterpiece, which IMHO was the best movie of the year, for those who are unfortunate enough to have not guessed it, I refer to The Dark Knight.

Two years later, I walked in the same movie hall, to watch another Christopher Nolan masterpiece. This man doesn't disappoint. He is the kind of director who can make a brilliant movie and make it in such a way that it enthralls the mass audience. It's two movies in a row that have had insane amounts of hype associated with them and have delivered far beyond what you can imagine before the first reel begins.

Inception is a movie whose story I will not even begin to explain in this review, you just have to watch it. But what I will do, is tell you just how good it is and why.

1. It has an amazing story line. It's simple stuff with complex implications. A dream within a dream, easy enough to understand for anyone. The dialogue in the movie isn't random sci-fi jargon.

2. Really good performances. I saw this random AFP link which said 'Inception is good but it needed The Joker'. Now whoever writes such bakwaas should be fired from his movie reviewing job. The movie has a stellar star cast, and everyone delivers.

3. Awesome action scenes. Without faking grandness, Nolan gives us awesome special effects which are amazingly worked into the story, just like in all his movies. The final hour of the film, is possibly one of the most complicated and perfect action sequences put on film. You have to constantly pay attention to remember all of the layers of what is happening.

4. Tempo. The movie has awesome tempo. The first half while moving the story forward, explains the technical workings of the new world that is the backdrop of the movie. Everything is explained and the concepts are great. Then the second half is jam packed with story thrills as well as amazing action set pieces. What is stunning is how Nolan gets the 'sci' so spot on along with the 'fi'.

5. The last scene. The movie's last scene is what gives the audience a collective gasp of appreciating Nolan's brilliance.

I won't say anymore. I just saw the best movie of the year!

Why you shouldn't believe The Alchemist

2010-07-11T07:35:00.000-07:00

When you know what you want the whole world conspires you to achieve it

This is what is mentioned in The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. It's a quote mentioned by far too many people when things work out for them. But it's not bloody true. So stop quoting it as if it was the divine message of Thor.

If this quote was true the following would have happened by now:

1. Paraguay would have reached and won the World Cup final and the streets of Paraguay would've seen a pair of truly golden globes.

2. Lame ass reality shows in India would've been off air.

3. REN and MEGA channels would've been back on air.

And instead of a Lenovo T400, I would've had Monica Bellucci and Adriana Lima on my lap right now.

Point made! So stop quoting that lame piece of trash and just go out and party when things have worked for you. Or else I'll post 'congrates' and 'best luck' all over your social networking site page. The previous sentence would make sense to mostly COEP junta :)

They hate love stories

2010-06-30T15:32:00.001-07:00

Yeah people they hate love stories. The pyaar ka dushman samaaj is a real badass.
Falling in love is so damn difficult. First you need to find the person of the right degree of hotness, intelligence and all the other senti stuff. Which itself is very difficult and you really hope the girl of your dreams aka THE ONE wasn't female-infanticided long back. Secondly we have our awesome village elders. I mean these guys are amazing specimens of humanity. The name khap is perfectly suited for these people. These people totally make you go, what the khap? [A term used already by a lot of bloggers already]

Seriously, what the khap is wrong with you - Oh great, wise chacha who never had a girlfriend?

You see, first you think the girl child is a dharti ka bojh and blah, so you kill as many as you can without going to jail. Then, the current lot of young lads with raging hormones suddenly realize, where are the women? Somehow, a guy finds the rare surviving female and they fall in love.

Then they realize, no one will support their marriage, so they elope. But then chacha is not too pleased, he'll get hold of the entire village to start a search and destroy mission that even the KGB and Mossad would be proud of. They all go I keeel you!

This comes on the news, the baju ke gaon ka chacha says, what the khap? Now even we have to come on the news, lets find another couple in love and kill them. And the story goes on.

Now because of chacha and his totally khapped up policies the youth are super confused. If you marry out of cast, chacha is angry and you are khapped! If you marry in caste then you're life is khapped bigtime! So what do you do? Well, tell chacha clearly whether he prefers Elton John and George Michael music or whether he thinks guys and girls should waka waka with whoever they want in life. Maybe that would open his khapped mentality a bit.

If only chacha would have had a girlfriend in his young days he would have probably had a better understanding of life, but alas!

It's not CONGRATES!

2010-06-21T01:31:00.000-07:00

This was something I should have done a long time ago, but didn't coz I was a nicer guy a year ago. One year into professional life and you realize what a waste of time it is being nice to dumb-asses. So here it is, my rant of the day.

It's with people f***ing up words that they should not f*** up ever! Words like 'Congrats'. The next person who posts a wall post or a comment saying 'congrates' will be publicly whipped, I promise.

I do not claim to be Oxford educated, I have my own typos/genuine mistakes etc. But then if corrected, I do make an effort to change. But here we have stubborn freakos who want to 'congrate-ulate' me or others I know without knowing how to spell 'congrats' in the first place.

What's the harm in typing 'well done' or 'badhaaiyan', you obv don't know English if you're 20 something and still say 'congrates'. It's like saying 'heppy bday'. Unforgivable. Absolutely.

Coke Studio

2010-06-10T13:41:00.000-07:00

By far the best music I have heard this year. I must thank Srini for introducing me to Coke Studio. It's got some of the best music in the 'sufi/fusion' genre of music. Which is not for everyone, but if you are open to experimenting, please give some of these songs a listen. The most awesome thing about it is that the songs are all free for download officially. So that sorts out access issues.

Here are a few songs I recommend:

Paimona by Zeb and Haniya. I absolutely fell in love with this song the moment I heard it. If you're extra enthu then check out the meaning of the song here.

In a year when even Rahman hasn't delivered his best, I am glad I discovered Coke Studio, although I can't imagine it took me 3 seasons of the show before I got to it. But I've more than made up for it by checking out all the songs. Some other recos:

Aik Alif - 3 vocalists on this track and each one gives a stunning performance.
Alif Allah - Very nice track with awesome pacing.
Saari Raat - The song is awesome and one for repeated listening. I love the way the song takes off suddenly in the middle.

Raajneeti is a must watch

2010-06-05T13:16:00.000-07:00

With Raajneeti, Prakash Jha practically rescues the the film industry. We have had trashy movies releasing one after the other for 6 months; many released with insane amounts of hype. This movie too had a huge amount of pre-release hype. But it delivered. Amazing acting by the entire cast. Stellar performances by Nana Patekar, Manoj Bajpai, Ajay Devgn and a very good performance by Ranbir Kapoor. Katrina doesn't mess it up which is good enough.

Too bad for people who went in expecting a biopic of a real life political leader, because it totally isn't the case. The story is amazingly well written. Not because its path breaking in concept, but because it is path breaking in the way its been weaved into a political drama.

This is the first movie of the year which has dialogues which seem like they've been worked upon, a script which has been really worked upon. I wish people like Prakash Jha were allowed this kind of a budget for all their movies because these are the guys who can make awesome movies with the 50-60 Crore budget range not dumb-f**ks from some of the major banners.

Some really kick ass plot twists in the first half setup the movie for being a smash hit. The second half will make a few people claim similarity with an ancient epic. But then there is no intent at all to do anything but follow the theme of the same ancient epic, so I don't know why some jackasses complain about a couple of scenes at the end.

Special mention for Nana Patekar. This guy takes it to the next level in his role of the guardian for the political family he supports. Some awesome scenes between him and Ajay Devgn and in particular his subtle looks and wry smiles tell you more than any lines could.

Ranbir Kapoor does his part pretty well actually. He chooses to underplay the role and it works. He doesn't go over the top. The one guy who has to go over the top at times is Manoj Bajpai and he does it very well, as the strategically weak leader who is so thirsty for power that he goes to all extremes to get it.

I felt that Arjun Rampal did his best, but maybe someone like Kay Kay Menon should've been considered for this role.

Another point of credit to the director is the fact that each character has been done justice to. He doesn't choose to overuse Ranbir or Katrina. Everyone has got his moment of glory in the movie.

I completely recommend this movie to you guys. Go watch it, its one of the better movies made in the past couple of years.

Arguably the most screwed up SMS I've read this year

2010-05-31T12:08:00.000-07:00

Ok, this I found hilarious. I read the following SMS and couldn't believe how screwed up someone's English can be. This person wrote this message with the intent of saying something profound, but has no clue of context or pronunciation and what we get is a masterpiece of divine stupidity and jackassness!
Here is the SMS:

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Life is library
Love is temporary
God is great
Life is sweet
Yesterday is waste
Today is best
Tomorrow is taste
So enjoy everyday
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Awesome Chat Snippet

2010-05-30T05:09:00.000-07:00

Awesome segment of a chat i just had with a school friend of mine who i last spoke to in 7th std.
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Friend: howz life man
Me: i'm fine dude...in Pune, working for a management consulting firm. wat hav u been upto
5:25pm
Friend: I have a construction company
I have a textile company
5:26pm
Me: awesome... only thing left for me to say now is mere paas maa hai :D:D
-----

Needless to say, the spark of friendship is still just as fresh as it was a decade ago!!!

It's Here

2010-05-13T22:49:00.000-07:00

Ok, so the promised blog is here.

Read on.

Inspiring Indian War Stories

2010-05-13T11:00:00.000-07:00

This post is to declare my intention of starting a new blog very soon, which will be of a slightly serious nature. In the sense that it will be a set of stories of brave deeds of the Indian Armed Forces pre and post Independence.

I come from an Army background and hence have heard of a number of amazing war stories, things which civilians have never heard of, things which our textbooks should have, but don't. I am no historian and would never dare to write anything fictional about the Armed Forces ever. Hence what this blog will have, a set of excerpts of amazing true stories from all over the Internet and from some books.

I do hope you visit the blog once it is opened and I also hope it does excite you, entertain you and in some small way make you feel even more proud of being an Indian.

I don't intend to come across as being pretentious, but I am 22 years old now, and I have never heard anyone in the mass media focus on these amazing stories. If even one of these stories is new for you, the purpose of the blog will be served.

Washing Powder Nirma and Amazing Talent

2010-05-07T12:37:00.000-07:00

If you are my friend on Facebook or have me on your GTALK list then I've probably already told you about this video by now. But this video is so hatke, I think it needs a mention on my blog too. This is some dude, with a guitar and a pretty kick ass voice, singing his version of the 'Nirma' jingle which we have all heard while growing up in the 90's and even now the ad plays almost the same jingle.

The part I like about this video is how, one can use talent and awesome creativity to totally turnaround a simple jingle into a freaking awesome short song. The guy puts in his soul into a friggin' jingle! It's one of the best videos I've seen this year, just for it's random awesomeness effect.

I initially thought it was funny, but then I heard it again and then again and well, whoever you are dude [from the video], hats off! Awesome voice and brilliant creativity.

If you haven't seen the video, here is the link for it.

Short Story - 1

2010-04-04T12:23:00.000-07:00

All characters and incidents appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, locations, incidents, is purely coincidental.
--------------------------

He walked swiftly... he knew there wasn't much time. He turned left, he looked around, he couldn't see a soul anywhere near him. He quickened his pace, hope rising in his heart with each step. He reached the door, stuck his hand out, turned the knob... the door was locked. His muscles tightened, he realized time was running out for him. Sweat forming on his forehead. He had to hurry. Please God, he begged. There was another door, to his right. He hastened towards it, tried the door. Locked. Damn it! He was breathing fast now, he didn't have much energy left. He turned around, there was one final door, he looked over his shoulder, wondering if there was anyone else approaching. He stopped breathing for a second and concentrated, he couldn't hear anyone else around. This was his last chance. If this door didn't open, it was all over. He moved quickly, desperation in every step. He lunged towards the door as he had no time to walk the last two steps. He turned the knob so hard, he almost wrenched it off the door itself. It was open, he had but a few seconds left to avert disaster.

Ten minutes later.

Sound of a flush... the victorious hero steps out... from the office rest-room!

Life is Busy

2010-03-28T13:32:00.000-07:00

I have been super busy since quite some time and it's taken a toll on my blogging. Whatever free time I get, I spend it in sleeping or catching up with friends or watching a movie and off late, in enjoying the IPL.

Everyone is busy with work, but some of us have more than usual work loads, it depends on luck and job profiles; but I have been having an exceptionally busy time. It's been fun at most times.

I will be back soon though with more of David Flabbergaster, one liners and random incidents pretty soon. The stories are all in my head and I'm waiting for some free time to put them up on the blog. Meanwhile, if you happen to visit the blog, read up on some of the links in the 'Recommended Reading' post to which I have a link at the start of the blog on the right hand side.

And if you've been in touch with me on the phone I am sure you already do know some of the stories ;)

Hope I get some free time pretty soon. See you later!

Loins of Punjab Presents

2010-03-28T13:04:00.000-07:00

I have never had so much fun watching a crossover film as I had while watching Loins Of Punjab Presents. It has some hilarious scenes and brilliant acting by the entire crew. The movie is about a 'Desi Idol' contest which is being sponsored by a company called Loins Of Punjab. They choose this lecherous organizer by the name of Bokade for the show, played brilliantly by Jameel Khan. The movie then shows the experiences of all the candidates who appear on the show for auditions and progress forward. Shabana Azmi plays a very bitchy socialite who wants to win the contest at any cost and plays the role to perfection. I loved the ending of the movie, which is really perfect for it. Special mention must be given to Seema Rehmani who plays Sania Rehman, a woman who can't speak Hindi at all but is in love with Bollywood. One line she says is pretty cool, 'Hollywood movies are so one dimensional, it's either an action movie or a romantic movie or a drama. But a Bollywood movie combines all of it in one. I don't know how to speak Hindi, but then again, I want to be an actor, so it's fine' :D

Another standout performance is by Ajay Naidu as Turbanotorious B.D.G. The man is hilarious in the role of a wannabe gangsta-bhagra-king! Insane performance, thoroughly enjoyable. The man dances very well in his performance scenes. Watch-out for the song 'Dhagi Naki Naki Naki Dhin Tara' funky song!

Shaan comes in for a special appearance as a judge in the final round and gives a brilliant WTF expression in one scene where one rejected contestant off stage starts singing the male version of 'Bole Chudiya' when Sania Rehman sings the female part on stage. Hilarity! Bokade is brilliant in a scene when he has a hangover and has to announce the results of the prelim round. Each time he announces a winner, the winner starts celebrating loudly and he gets pissed because of the loud celebrations :D Lots of other hilarious scenes especially with Darshan Zariwalla as a Gujju family patriarch trying to make sure his daughter wins the contest.

The movie is a must see, can't imagine someone not liking it. I for one loved it and would recommend it to everyone.

Karthik Calling Karthik - Movie Review

2010-02-26T12:41:00.001-08:00

One Word - Bakwaas!

If you still want to read more, here you go.

I have seen a lot of bad movies, and I never thought I'd hate a movie more than Singh Is Kinng and then I saw Karthik Calling Karthik.

I won't even insult your intelligence by telling you the story line, because it is pointless. The movie is riddled with crappy over-acting by Deepika in almost every scene, lousy situations which try to be cool/cute/intelligent but are completely the opposite. Farhan Akhtar is an OK actor but he is far better as a director and should stick to it. I have nothing good to say about this movie.

Nadia - Lesser Know but Awesome Song

2010-02-11T04:54:00.000-08:00

I just stumbled onto this song while going through my bro's iPod. Freaking brilliant, if you like to experiment with fusion once in a while. Later, when I was just randomly Googling the song, I stumbled onto many versions of this song played brilliantly by Jeff Beck. Take a look at one of those versions.

The song is called "Nadia" by Nitin Sawhney and Reena Bharadwaj.

Star Screen Awards - Good ceremony, crazy award choices

2010-02-05T12:32:00.000-08:00

Disclaimer: Fans of Paa do not read this post! Fans of Love Aaj Kal do not read this post.

I happened to catch some parts of the Star Screen Awards last week and I thought the jokes that night were pretty well done. But freaking hell, did they mess up the actual awards bigtime!

Some screamers:

Best Dialogues - Abhijat Joshi, Raju hirani (3 Idiots)

Are you kidding me, KAMINEY people! It had the lines of the year! Especially when it comes to quality and depth of thought.

Best Lyricist - Irshad Kamil For Choor Bazari ( Love Aaj Kal)

WTF, when you have Gulzar nailing every song of Kaminey with awesome lyrics, you nominate and then give the award to the most lame song of Love Aaj Kal, even Yeh Dooriyan was better.

Best Music Director - A R Rahman ( Delhi 6 )

I love A R Rahman's music, but Dev D was far superior to Delhi 6!

Best Jodi of the decade: Shahrukh Khan and Kajol

While giving away this award they showed clips of DDLJ and KKHH, both movies from the 90's, I think they got confused about which decade they were giving away the award for, as it is I think it should have gone to SRK and K Jo :D

Best Editing Results - Raju Hirani (3 Idiots)

Dev D being technically superior to 3 Idiots should have been given it's due! One only has to look back to the dope scenes of Abhay Deol to know which had superior editing.

Best Story - Imtiaz Ali ( Love Aaj Kal)

An award for Best Story given to a movie which had the crappiest 2nd half of the year! They might as well have given it to Blue or Kambakth Ishq.

The final screamer:

Best Actor: Amitabh Bachchan (Paa)

I have the greatest respect for AB, but please! Out of sheer respect for his tremendous skill I wanted to refrain from shredding the movie Paa on my blog. But then when performances like Dev in Dev D and Shahid's awesome double role in Kaminey are ignored for trashy campy rubbish like Paa, one can't help it. It was a disastrous movie which just got away with the sympathy card and was called a hit! It's almost a crime to criticize movies made on people suffering from problems, but honestly Paa was trash!

I really wish award ceremonies stopped celebrating camps in Bollywood and instead actually gave awards to the deserving performances!

Dil Toh Bachcha Hai Ji - Lyrics

2010-01-08T02:51:00.000-08:00

My first fave of the New Year, it's a song from the movie Ishqiya. I especially liked the remix version, the original is also amazing. Brilliant track from the amazing combination of Gulzar and Vishal Bharadwaj.

Aisi uljhi nazar unse hatt ti nahi
Daant se reshmi dor katt ti nahi
Umar kab ki baras ke safaid ho gayi
Kaari badari jawani ki chatt ti nahi
Walla ye dhadkan bhadne lagi hai
Chehre ki rangat udne lagi hai
Darr lagta hai tanha sone mein ji
Dil to bachcha hai ji
Dil to bachcha hai ji
Thoda kaccha hai ji
Haan dil to baccha hai ji
Aisi ulji nazar unse hatt ti nahi
Daant se reshmi dor katt ti nahi
Umar kab ki baras ke safaid ho gayi
Kaari badari jawani ki chatt ti nahi
Ra ra ra ..

Kisko ptaa tha pehlu mein rakha
Dil aisa baaji bhi hoga
Hum to hamesha samajhte the koi
Hum jaisa haaji hi hoga
Hai zor karein, kitna shor karein
Bewaja baatein pe ainwe gaur karein
Dilsa koi kameena nahi
Koi to rokey, koi to tokey
Iss umar mein ab khaogey dhokhe
Darr lagta hai ishq karne mein ji
Dil to bachcha hai ji
Dil to bachcha hai ji
Thoda kaccha hai ji
Haan dil to baccha hai ji

Aisi udhaasi baithi hai dil pe
Hassne se ghabra rahe hain
Saari jawani katra ke kaati
Piri mein takra gaye hain
Dil dhadakta hai to aise lagta hai woh
Aa raha hai yahin dekhta hi na woh
Prem ki maarein kataar re
Taubah ye lamhe katt te nahi kyun
Aankhein se meri hatt te nahi kyun
Darr lagta hai mujhse kehne mein ji
Dil toh bachcha hai ji
Dil toh bachcha hai ji
Thoda kaccha hai ji
Haan dil toh baccha hai ji

5/5 for this song.

Why December was such a great movie month...

2009-12-29T13:21:00.000-08:00

You have a roller coaster year, then have an incredibly busy December. You work your ass off all month, burn the midnight lamp, when even that goes off, you just bear the excess strain of the laptop light in your eyes and carry on working. But then comes that occasional evening when you decide that it's movie time. You pay big bucks for it and go to the theater... hoping, praying even, that at least it won't be a total waste of money. Then... all of a sudden, from nowhere you get to see something on the big screen that makes you thank God that you bought that ticket and came to the theater.

That happened to me twice in close succession this month. I saw two outstanding movies.

Avatar and 3 Idiots. I didn't even have time to write a review for Avatar, but now that I've just come home fresh from watching 3 Idiots, I think it'd be unfair to praise one while forgetting the other.

Avatar showed me special effects that totally made up for the super expensive price of the ticket. 3 Idiots showed us why Rajkumar Hirani is easily the best director of the decade and why Aamir is the Ace of Bollywood. Both the movies have amazing repeat value. Both have super expensive tickets, but both are totally worth it.

Avatar has brilliant special effects along with a decent storyline to back it up.

3 Idiots... IMHO is far far better than the book it is inspired from. The best moments of the movie have nothing to do with the book. That is why I loved the movie. You know that in the end everything will be fine, but you still are engrossed in the movie, rooting for the characters. Anything that has repeat value, has it because what you've seen impresses you so much that you want to see it again. That is what Avatar and 3 Idiots do to you. They make you enjoy the show so much, you just know it by the interval that you will be back in the queue to watch another show very soon.

Special mention to Boman Irani, whose performance in 3 Idiots seems extremely natural. I think he doesn't get enough credit for the incredible work he does in Raju Hirani movies, each movie he has been the pivotal antagonistic character [not a villain in the usual sense], but each time he plays the character so naturally that it's not Boman Irani you remember, you just remember Dr. Asthana or Lucky Singh or Viru Sahasrabuddhe aka Virus :P

All in all, a brilliant movie month. One can only hope there are more such months in the coming year. Thank you James Cameron and Raju Hirani!

December

2009-12-26T13:22:00.000-08:00

December 09 has been by far the busiest month of my life. Everything has been in fast motion. I've worked crazy hours [current personal record being 19 hours in the day], slept very little [an average of 4 hours for 2 straight weeks], spent an entire weekend working [a first ever] and still managed to catch Avatar, Rocket Singh, Paa [wtf] and a host of other movies that I found time to catch up with. I managed to keep in touch with friends no matter what. Basically, a lot happened.

Fortunately along with a lot of work, I did end up having a lot of fun as well.

A brilliant photo of a brilliant Tendulkar shot

2009-12-01T23:17:00.000-08:00

Source Link - http://blogs.cricinfo.com/shotselection/archives/2009/11/tendulkar_turns_it_around.php

This photo looks like it's a straight drive, but since the wicketkeeper is facing Sachin, it obviously is not a straight drive. Tendulkar used this shot against Warne in his first innings century in the third Test in Chennai in 2001. A match we eventually won! Stuff that only true cricket lovers will enjoy. Brilliant photo!

Funkiest College Names

2009-11-30T00:51:00.000-08:00

I have no words to explain this, just take a look. This is actually true.

I wish I would've known of this college before I joined COEP :D

American History X - Review

2009-11-27T12:24:00.000-08:00

This is yet another, revisited movie review. I just saw this movie an hour back, thank God I skipped the De Dana Dan outing or else I would've missed watching American History X. A truly amazing movie about racism in America and how devastating it can be when the youth get misguided.

This movie is a must watch simply for the stunning screenplay, direction and for one of the best ever performances by Edward Norton. In the movie he seamlessly portrays three different versions of the same characters through flashbacks and in the present.

The transformation in his persona is so amazing - take for instance the flashback of his impressionable teen days, he actually acts and looks the age.

Then as the adult Neo-Nazi White Supremacist who goes all out in his hate based on race. The telling sequence, where he slaughters a black gang member, the look that he gives as he is being arrested - genius!

And then, once again, the transformed and repentant man who finally realizes what a wrong path he had chosen.

Special mention to the director for not being biased for or against any race while making the movie, it is not some propaganda/preachy movie. It is a brilliant showcase of what hate does to society.

A little lesson in the movie which is applicable in all intolerant situations, where misguided youngsters are driven on a path of anger and hatred by someone who rides the wave for personal benefit, is shown through a perfectly crafted scene in the movie. Derek Vinyard [Edward Norton] has his illusion of White Supremacy shattered in prison. As he lies broken on a hospital bed, his former history teacher [an African American] comes to console him. Derek still clings on to his hate philosophy though he accepts things aren't what he thought they were. That's when Prof Sweeney and Derek have this conversation:

Bob Sweeney: There was a moment... when I used to blame everything and everyone... for all the pain and suffering and vile things that happened to me, that I saw happen to my people. Used to blame everybody. Blamed white people, blamed society, blamed God. I didn't get no answers 'cause I was asking the wrong questions. You have to ask the right questions.
Derek Vinyard: Like what?
Bob Sweeney: Has anything you've done made your life better?

____________________________________

That dialogue is something applicable to every situation where one lets anger and hate take control. Brilliant scene!

The rest of the movie is just as good and it was a pity that this Oscar nominated movie didn't go on to win the Best Picture award. But something like this rarely gets made. Edward Norton carries the movie on his shoulders and well, that's it, it's a must see!

Rating - 9/10

QSQT song - Shocker of a rip off

2009-11-27T02:23:00.000-08:00

In another example of shameless ripping off from lesser known western songs [i.e. lesser known in India] resulting in super hit "originals" we have this masterpiece from Qayamat Se Qayamat Tak:

Return to the Alamo by The Shadows here is clearly ripped off by Anand-Milind in QSQT's super hit track Akele Hain Toh Kya Gum Hai.

Dumb Q, dumb A

2009-11-22T10:23:00.000-08:00

Q: Dude, I've heard that if you use a Bose headphone and put the volume on zero, you can hear nothing but silence, is it true?
A: Yeah only as long as you don't talk or fart!

Paranormal Activity Movie Review

2009-11-22T08:24:00.000-08:00

Ok, so finally we have a movie that succeeds in scaring you enough that you know watching it was worth it.

This movie is more of a psychological horror movie than one of the usual horror movies that one gets to see. The best part about it was that even though you know from the start that when the night video screen comes on, something scary will happen; you think you're prepared for it, but when the scary stuff happens you're still getting scared and loving each minute of Micah and Katie getting spooked by the "evil entity".

I don't want to go into the story and spoil it for you even a bit, but this I got to say, the night video thingy becomes so great a scare tactic in the movie that towards the last 15 minutes, just the fact that the night video comes on, starts to frighten the audience. That is the beauty of a psychological thriller.

The base story is of this couple who are living together, the girl Katie starts having recurring experiences that frighten her. The boyfriend, who spends the first 30 minutes providing some laughs with his witty comments on the events going on, initially thinks of all the spookiness as some sort of a game... well the movie is basically shot in home video style and it adds to the value of the movie. The end is so freaking awesome that it takes it to the next level.

On the comparison with Blair Witch Project, I think this movie is slightly better, simply because that movie tried to, at times, fool the audience with a lot of spooky stuff happening off the camera and the end kind of messed it up. This movie isn't trying to prove some myth or any such thing, it has just one purpose to screw with your head and scare you. The movie starts of slowly and builds to a crescendo. A brilliant last 5 minutes make it the horror movie of the year. Go ahead and watch it, even though you will want to quit the movie at times because it just gets scarier and scarier you will feel compelled to finish it out of curiosity.

It has set the record as the most profitable independent film ever made having earned over $100 million with a production budget of $15,000.

4/5 for this movie.

November Rain Lyrics

2009-11-22T06:48:00.001-08:00

This song is so famous and awesome that me posting the lyrics on the blog, is more out of respect for this amazing song than for informing anyone about it. In case you haven't heard it yet, please do so immediately. Here is the link.

Here are the lyrics of one of the greatest songs of all time:

When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain
We've been through this
Such a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain
Yeahh..
But lovers always come
And lovers always go
And no one's really sure
Who's lettin' go today
Walking away
If we could take the time
To lay it on the line
I could rest my head
Just knowin' that you were mine
All mine
So if you want to love me
Then darlin' don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walkin'
In the cold November rain

Do you need some time
On your own
Do you need some time
All alone
Everybody needs some time
On their own
Don't you know you need some time
All alone

I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you

Sometimes I need some time
On my own
Sometimes I need some time
All alone
Everybody needs some time
On their own
Don't you know you need some time
All alone

And when your fears subside
And shadows still remain
I know that you can love me
When there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness
We still can find a way
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
Even cold November rain

Don't ya think that you
Need somebody
Don't ya think that you
Need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one

Don't ya think that you
Need somebody
Don't ya think that you
Need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one

Don't ya think that you
Need somebody
Don't ya think that you
Need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one

Don't ya think that you
Need somebody
Don't ya think that you
Need someone
Everybody needs somebody

Another insane clothing item

2009-11-17T07:01:00.000-08:00

After the brilliant Ipod charging bra, here is the next path-breaking clothing item which deserves mention on the blog - the venetian blind shirt

Innovation zindabad :D

Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani - Movie Review

2009-11-08T07:29:00.000-08:00

Thankfully I saw this movie during the weekend without having read a single movie review in detail [I just saw the ratings and skipped the rest]. The movie is extremely entertaining, from the promos itself you know it isn't supposed to make any sense. It's a movie that's supposed to entertain you.

The movie is a bunch of sequences strung together to make you laugh and feel good. Staying true to it's name, the movie does have many random twists to the story. Ranbir Kapoor gives another smashing performance, be it the comedy, drama, dance you name it - he does it well. Katrina, well, just watching this woman on screen is worth the time. She just pulls of every kind of look. Her accent too in the movie is acceptable considering her story background. Some really nice touches in the movie are the stammering thingy that the two protagonists do when they get emotional. Darshan Zariwalla and Ranbir play the hilarious father and son angle very well. Two scenes in particular are awesome - in which a fantasizing Ranbir's murmurs are heard by his dad and taken to be compliments, the other is the one in which Ranbir has to get Katrina out of the bathroom before his dad enters - hilarity!

The music of the movie is extremely popular and has been done justice to in the movie. The songs don't come in the way of the story telling. One complaint I had in the movie was the stretched out fight sequence which was nowhere near the similarly stretched out fight sequence in Andaaz Apna Apna, but that was God level comedy. Apart from that minor minor glitch I loved every other sequence.

The most entertaining movie of the year, you can watch this one with friends or family.

All in all, a very entertaining movie, go have fun people!

Sachin Tendulkar - The shining star on a dark night

2009-11-05T12:04:00.001-08:00

Today we saw a match in Hyderabad, which had one of the all time greatest ODI knocks by the man who has brought glory to India so many times that being a fan of the great man is an honour by itself.

The problem is that he is miles ahead of all the rest. Today's match for instance, just contrast the last ball catch he took with the rest of the team's efforts. Giving away 100 plus runs in the last 10 overs, how do you expect to win a game with bowlers who seem to be so secure in their mediocrity while Zaheer Khan is away? We so dearly miss Anil Kumble who actually used to put the breaks on the opposition. Mark my words, the Indian batting line up will face a similar fate once Sachin Tendulkar retires. These two men, have one huge factor in common. Determination. They have endured everything to win a match. Just think back to the game where Anil Kumble bowled with a broken jaw or the game where Sachin battled his aching back to battle Akram and co. in Chennai. A loss actually pains them. Both were miles ahead of their team mates.

The very fact that India looked like winning the game is a testimony to the Herculean effort of Mr. Sachin Tendulkar. 175 from 141 at the age of 36, batting from the first over till the 47th. What else can we ask of him? And it wasn't just the runs he scored, look at the way he did it. It was an honour to see him in action today, just as it is each time he graces the field.

During the match a friend of mine said, "Even after this innings some people will say, he doesn't play well when it counts". I told him that such remarks and comments don't deserve a reply. You can not give sight to the blind. Only fools will choose to criticize a legend like this when they should be catching every glimpse of his genius while it is still on display. In a few years there won't be the name Sachin Tendulkar on the score board when India plays. There wont be the name which tilts the game just by his mere presence. There will no longer be the man who gives us hope when there would be none if it weren't for him. We'd have these T20 wonders, people who think hitting 30 from 20 balls is a job well done. People who won't dive and would rather get run out. People who would buckle under the sheer pressure of having to chase 7 runs an over from ball one.

I for one just respect the fact that I have seen this man play innings like the one today, or the one at Sharjah, or the one in Johannesburg against Pakistan in the World Cup, or the one in the Chennai Test, innings' which were decades apart at times and yet reminded you of the single factor binding all of them - Sachin Tendulkar carrying the hopes of a billion.

In school, the entire lot of us used to watch him play, in college it was the same at the canteen or the hostel mess, now I am in office and still when he plays everyone makes it a point to see him score his 17000th run, or his 45th century, those who can't or are in a meeting have Cricinfo on their screens.

I will henceforth never bother to respond to a critic of this legend, who is above all petty complaints. I have seen a man who in one lifetime has played innings that others won't even if they were given ten.

About the match we just saw, the bowlers are the main culprits, this is not a bowling attack worthy of a team that wants to be the World No. 1! The batting line up hasn't got the patience or determination to win consistently. At the crucial times the only one who stands up to be counted is Sachin Tendulkar whose brilliance is such that even his severest critics have to applaud.

Todays game proves that Sachin Tendulkar is still and will always be the greatest batsman of our time.

Things that went wrong today:

1. Fielding
2. Bowling
3. Crappy batting by the Young brigade.
4. A thankless presentation ceremony speech by MS Dhoni [for whom I have lost a lot of respect]

Something about MSD, if you see the stats and check the number of times we have won due to Sachin under his captaincy, you'll be alarmed at how much Sachin's brilliance has contributed to his success.

Anyways, at the end of the day, Sachin will play many more such awesome innings, we will win most of the times and on a few occasions lose! But the one thing the rest of the team must remember, something that Sachin mentioned in his Man of the Match speech, "He is proud to play for India". It's India you are playing for! If only the others realized this, we would win most of these crunch games.

Thanks for yet another innings of a lifetime Sachin. Everyday your legend grows bigger!

London Dreams Movie Review

2009-11-01T05:07:00.000-08:00

So I saw London Dreams today with friends [yes, I am vela on weekends and do take risks with my life by going for such movies] and it sucked! But even in this disaster of a movie, there was a saving grace, Salman Khan. That guy was acting so well it seemed like he was in an altogether different movie, gone was his accented Hindi which he seemed to be stuck with for the past few years, gone was the campy acting. Here was a man acting beyond what one could imagine. He did comedy and drama with his trademark charm. His role was so refreshing, that one actually felt the movie may survive but that's where the entire cast and crew delivered the killer punch. Ajay Devgn [if he changed his surname based on an astrologer then he better realize it's not his name but his astrologer that needs a change] was completely out of place in this movie. Not that he didn't act well, it's just that you can't cast someone like him as a rock star, he just can't pull it off no matter how good an actor he is. It's like asking Sachin Tendulkar to run like Usain Bolt. It won't happen, even if the man gives it everything he's got.

The dialogues suck, e.g. Bhagvan kyu tum Mannu ke gale mein baith gaye? [asks a crestfallen Ajay after he watches Mannu i.e. Salman Khan steal the show during a performance] The music sucks big time, for a movie based on a musical backdrop not one song is a super hit.

Asin, what the heck is she doing in this movie? What was her dad doing in this movie [not her real dad, her movie dad]? Why the hell was this movie made?

Now for some non LD stuff, I saw Amadeus last night, and not to act like some pretentious Hollywood worshiper, but LD is clearly a rip off of Amadeus. That movie is a 3 hour acting extravaganza. The role of Salieri [the basis of Ajay Devgn's character] is brilliantly crafted and exceptionally performed. Mozart's musical genius is well exploited in the movie. In this movie you hardly see that apart from the rip off scene in which Mannu takes a tune composed by Arjun and improves it impromptu.

I just feel bad about one thing, Salman Khan's best performance in a long time was wasted in this dud of a film. On the other hand, at least something was worth watching in the movie.

Kanye West meme - Ponting

2009-10-31T01:36:00.000-07:00

I know the art work on this meme isn't great. But bhaavnaaon ko samjho :P

I'm gonna let you finish...

2009-10-28T11:14:00.001-07:00

This I found absolutely hilarious... and had to put on my blog. For those of you who didn't get it, just search for the following term on Google - "Kanye West Taylor Swift" and you'll get the joke. I don't think this joke will get old, there are so many modifications possible!

Paisa vasool match that India lost

2009-10-25T05:58:00.000-07:00

I've seen a lot of cricket right since childhood, the memory of that India Pak game where Tendulkar brought us to the brink of victory before falling still hurts. Even though India lost the match, it was an enthralling game which you'll remember forever. Since then India has improved as a team and our complete reliance on one man has come to an end.

Today however I saw a different kind of paisa vasool match that we lost. I was out all day and finally started watching the game at the stage when we required an impossible 42 runs from 18 balls and just Bhajji and Pravin at the crease who could hold the bat, Ishant and Nehra don't qualify to be called batsmen even when they have the bats in their hands. The awesome hitting that followed for the next 12 balls was so insane that it easily made up for the eventual loss, just seeing Watson getting smashed for 20 runs in the penultimate over was worth it. 9 of the last over was very likely but then, the momentum died after Bhajji left. Cricketers like Bhajji are crucial for cricket, they are the entertainers. When Bhajji bats, you will be entertained. And when he bats the way he did today, it's full too paisa vasool.

Well, seeing the crowds in the stadium, one can safely say that cricket of any kind is safe in India and the close finish shows promise for this series. Time for Sachin Tendulkar to show his masterclass yet again. Trust me non-believers he'll come to the party soon!

Can you spot the difference... err... similarity?

2009-10-24T06:47:00.000-07:00

I don't want to go into discussing plagiarism on the blog, but I had to write this post on the blog. I recently heard the song Shukran Allah from the upcoming movie Kurbaan and immediately I had this huge feeling that I've heard this before, a few minutes later I remembered where. Now the song Shukran Allah is one of those songs that has a 20 second bit that is the best part of the song while the rest is average fair.

Here are two links, the first is the video for Shukran Allah on Youtube and the other is a video of the song The Journey by Dolores O'Riordan. The rest is for you fellas to decide.

Shukran Allah from Kurban

The Journey [Please jump to the 1st minute 11th second of the video]

Another massive massive instance I can remember is from the movie Dillagi, it's a song called Haan Haan Mujhe Pyar Hai, unbelievable how similar the two songs are. Here are the links, check them out and decide for yourself.

Can't Take My Eyes Off You

Haan Haan Mujhe Pyaar Hai (Dillagi)

The videos make it quite clear which song came first.

But what once can't digest is these songs didn't come from the famed Anu Malik, the song Shukran Allah is by Salim Sulaiman and the music for Dillagi was given by Jatin Lalit and Shankar Ehsaan and Loy.

Anyways, plagiarism in movie songs is nothing new, but the Shukraan Allah thingy was something I had to post since the song will surely be played a lot during promotion of the movie.

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist - Music and Movie Review

2009-10-19T05:58:00.000-07:00

I was looking forward to this movie for quite some time and finally saw it a few months ago. I didn't have time to write a review back then. While watching the movie one can't ignore the perfect soundtrack that it has.

The story is about two people, Nick and Norah. Nick is the sole straight member of a gay-band called The Jerk Offs and is recovering from a bad breakup. Norah is the girl who calls herself the musical soul-mate of Nick and is in a crappy relationship with a guy whose sole purpose is to use Norah's dad's studio to release his band's album.

The story moves along during a night when Nick and Norah finally meet at a gig and spend the night looking out for their favorite band, 'Where's Fluffy', who are supposed to perform later that night. A sequence of events bring them closer to each other. The movie is based on a book and in it's treatment reminds one of Juno. Michael Cera acts well in a role he can patent - the likable loser. Kat Dennings plays the awkward Norah to perfection and does really well throughout the movie.

All in all a really nice, breezy movie which has a few laughs sprinkled on top.

The soundtrack has many songs from indie bands amongst others. My favorite songs being - Xavia by The Submarines and Lover by Devendra Banhart. A different soundtrack which goes really well with the movie. If you haven't seen it, then do so, but when you have the time to watch a movie like this one... probably a lazy Sunday afternoon. Hear the songs from the soundtrack. Nice stuff!

Staying hungry and foolish

2009-10-14T02:18:00.001-07:00

If you're foolish, you'll stay hungry!

If you stay hungry and you stay foolish, you're probably a retard on a diet!

You can win, as soon as you stop reading crap and start doing some actual work.

Tera Hone Laga Hoon - Lyrics

2009-10-10T13:57:00.000-07:00

This is my favorite track from the soundtrack of Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani. The lines in English aren't anything special, the Hindi lines are far more meaningful, the song is very melodious, nice job Pritam.

Music : Pritam Chakraborty
Singers : Atif Aslam,Alisha Chenoy Neeraj Shredhar
Lyricists : Irshad Kamil

Song: Tera Hone Laga Hoon

---------------------------------

Shining In The Setting Sun Like A Pearl Up On The Ocean
Come And Feel Me
Feel Me
Shining In The Setting Sun Like A Pearl Up On The Ocean
Come And Heal Me
Heal Me
Thinking Abt The Love We Make And Our Life Sharing
Come And Feel Me
HO Feal Me

Shining In The Setting Sun Like A Pearl Up On The Ocean
Come And Feel Me
Come on Heel Me

Tu Aaja Tu Bhi Mera Mera
Tera Jo Ikrarr Hua

To Kyun Na Mein Bhi
Keh Dun Keh Dun
Hua Mujhe Bhi Pyaar Hua

Tera Hone Laga Hoon
Khone Laga Hoon
Jab Se Mila Hoon

Tera Hone Laga Hoon
Khone Laga Hoon
Jab Se Mila Hoon

Shining In The Setting Sun Like A Pearl Up On The Ocean
Come And Feel Me
O Heal Me

Waise To Mann Mera
Phele Bhi Raaton Mein
Aksar Hi Chahat Ke Haan
Sapne Sanjota Tha

Phele Bhi Dhadkan Yeh
Dhun Koi Gaati Thi
Par Abb Jo Hota Hai Woh
Phele Na Hota Tha

Hua Hai Tujhe Jo Bhi Jo Bhi
Mujhe Bhi Is Paar Hua

To Kyu Na Main Bhi Keh Doon Keh Doon
Hua Mujhe Bhi Pyaar Hua

Tera Hone Laga Hoon
Khone Laga Hoon
Jab Se Mila Hoon

Tera Hone Laga Hoon
Khone Laga Hoon
Jab Se Mila Hoon

Annkhon Se Chuu Loon Ki
Bahein Tarasti Hain
Dil Ne Pukara Hai Haan
Abb Tu Chale Aao

Aao To Shabnam Ki Boodein Barasti Hain
Mausam Ishara Hai Haan
Aab To Chale Aao

Bahon Mein Dale Bahein Bahein
Bahon Ka Jaise Haar Hua
Haan Mana Mene Maana Mana
Hua Mujhe Bhi Pyaar Hua

Tera Hone Laga Hoon
Khone Laga Hoon
Jab Se Mila Hoon

Tera Hone Laga Hoon
Khone Laga Hoon
Jab Se Mila Hoon

Shining In The Setting Sun Like A Pearl Up On The Ocean
Come And Feel Me
Haan Feel Me...

The Sixth Sense

2009-10-09T14:56:00.000-07:00

I saw it in 1999, it's twist ending is so awesome that even today, 10 years after I first saw it, the effect is just the same. This was truly an incredible movie, with Bruce Willis giving an amazing, subdued performance as the child psychologist looking for redemption after a failed patient comes back one day to change his life forever.

The child actor, Haley Joel Osment gave an extraordinary performance which was parallel only to Macaulay Culkin's awesome performance as a child actor. But obviously the roles were completely different, for different genres. Here was a kid who made a line like, "I see dead people" into a famous quote.

Finally full credit to M "Night" Shyamalan. Whatever people say about his movies today, one cannot deny that he delivered one of the all time greatest thrillers in the form of The Sixth Sense. Look at movies since then, insane budgets, special effects galore and the audience is unmoved. This movie was made for $40 million and it made more than $670 million, for a then unheard of director like Shyamalan is testimony to the quality of this movie. The much talked about twist ending is, unbelievably awesome. The beauty of it is that, he hasn't tried to fool the audience, he just divulged the information at the very end of the movie, something which is totally justified in all the scenes before once you see it in retrospect. Brilliant!

Why am I writing this today, well, because I didn't have a blog in 1999 and I just saw this movie on TV a few hours back. If for some reason, you haven't watched this movie as yet, just stop whatever you are doing and watch the movie.

P.S. - Another movie you ought to see is The Omen [the 1970's version]

Inglourious Basterds Movie Review

2009-10-04T07:32:00.001-07:00

So I finally saw the eagerly anticipated Inglourious Basterds this weekend, and well I liked it a lot. Primary reasons, it's like any Tarantino movie, fast paced, fun and contains awesome characters with killer dialogue.
The story of the movie is simple, it involves a plot to kill the top brass of the Nazi regime when they are in a theater for a propaganda movie premiere. But screw the plot, the acting is top notch, I loved the cameo by Mike Myers playing a British officer who gives a briefing about the mission. One thing I must say, Brad Pitt was a total waste in the movie, him talking in the hillbilly accent was actually irritating and a distraction. But... but, but the movie is taken to the next level by one, standout performance by an actor named Christopher Waltz playing the character of Col. Hans Landa.

Col. Landa is the definition of an evil, cunning Nazi called the Jew Hunter. The opening scene where he has this insane conversation with a French man who is a Jewish sympathizer is brilliant. The dialogue in which he compares Nazi's and Jew's to hawks and rats is brilliant [no I am not a Nazi, it's just that the dialogue was freaking awesome].

In my humble opinion he totally deserves and Oscar for the portrayal of Hans Landa and in all likelihood will get it.

The movie is totally enjoyable and must be seen. One thing I must mention, a movie like Inglourious Basterds, which has dialogues which can be considered offensive by the Jewish community is released without any incident all over the world and becomes a super hit. One wonders if India, once upon a time a tolerant country is losing it's sense of tolerance! Think about it, maybe it's time Indians should Wake Up!

Incidents - 2

2009-09-29T12:16:00.000-07:00

Here's an assortment of random non-topical stuff from the past few weeks, it's been a while since I posted some original crappy stuff on the blog, so here goes...

My friend asked me if I've changed my ancient, non-digital-looking Nokia 2300 and I said, "No". He asked me why? I said, "A crappy mobile... it's like a bad GF, u wanna get rid of it, but u're just too poor for a new one!"

I went to Herbs and Spices this month with some of my friends and there was this waiter who was acting really weird. For e.g. we ordered 4 soups and when we asked him to repeat the order he totally got it wrong, sweet corn was replaced by lung fung, wtf? So we were all a bit irritated by what happened, then he gets the soup and we've not even had a taste of it when he says in a slightly rude tone, "Main course boliye". I look up at him and say, "Main course!"
All four of us burst out laughing, on hindsight it's one of those stupid incidents which I really hope I don't repeat again till I'm 90 years old and probably senile, but the waiter totally started behaving normally after that and we all had some silly fun. I can't really believe I actually did that, but I guess it's one of those things!

One keeps getting calls from all kinds of banks who are so eager to dish out loans and credit cards to me, it's almost as if they've got too much money with them. The thing is they've also become smart, they call from different phone numbers and each time it starts with, "Hello, is that Mr. XYZ" and Mr. XYZ is like, "Yeah". "I'm calling from Fraudibank, would you like a personal loan?" Mr. XYZ has no qualms in ending the call. But then the next day you get a call from Bank of Balochistan asking you if you want a BOB Card and you're wondering how many banks really are there in this world? Now after all the exaggeration in this incident, time for a real narrative, I got this call asking me, "Sir, we would like to designate for you a Wealth Manager, when would you be free to meet him?" I say, "As soon as I have some wealth!"

That's all folks!!!

Google News - Confused

2009-09-28T19:49:00.000-07:00

I just noticed this a few minutes back and thought it deserves a mention. At 8:17 AM today if one were to use Google News and go to their Sports section, something random was on display. An article about Harbhajan Singh with Dr. Manmohan Singh's photo alongside the link! Dr. Singh's photo link then takes you to this article about Indo-Pak relations what is that story doing in the sports page?

A little confused, Google News?

This man is a genius!

2009-09-28T13:13:00.000-07:00

Robin Williams is arguably one of the greatest entertainers of all time. The man is not only a great comedian, he is also an exceptional actor. One only needs to see Dead Poets Society, which I saw some years back and it blew me away! Carpe Diem has ever since been in my thoughts every day.

Why am I suddenly writing this? Well, because while India and Australia were waiting for the rains to abate, which eventually didn't happen, I was busy searching and then enjoying some amazing stand up acts of Robin Williams. I had seen the entire Robin Williams Live on Broadway DVD in TY, but that's just the tip of the iceberg. This is comic genius in it's purest form, the man cracks hilarious jokes on the fly! A lot of my friends haven't seen much of this genius in action so I'm posting a lot of video links which I think should be seen. So whenever you have time, just check them out, Robin Williams ladies and gentlemen!

Robin Williams on Obama and Bush: Sitting in the audience, Prince Charles and family amongst others!
Robin Williams on American Idol
Robin Williams and Owen Wilson: Robin Williams lets it rip in this spontaneous interview while Owen Wilson gets completely overshadowed
Robin Williams on Golf: My personal favorite [profanity alert] from his famous Live On Broadway performance.

Take a bow Robin Williams and thanks for all the laughs, looking forward to a lot more!

They're Back!

2009-09-23T07:47:00.000-07:00

2 of the 3 shows I've followed over the past few years had great starts to their new seasons. How I Met Your Mother and the great House MD. I'm waiting for 30 Rock next month.

Season 5 of House ended with Dr. Gregory House having voluntarily admitted himself in an asylum for curing his delusions, season 6 starts of just where it left and in such an awesome way. The best thing about the show is how it dares to break boundaries, imagine a season premiere without any of the major characters apart from House himself and a fleeting glimpse of his best friend Wilson. The premiere was a 2 episode special and a great start to a great show.

How I Met Your Mother started off pretty nicely as well, finally we get to see Barney and Robin actually as a couple, I guess as far as Ted is concerned he might take 10 seasons to get to his real wife, or maybe he could end up saying, "Well, kids, I just can't remember who your mother is 'cause I think you both were adopted!"

But more on House, I am eagerly looking forward to all the episodes of the show, it's the only 40 minute per episode show I am hooked onto along with Boston Legal. So... I'm glad they're back!

Layla Lyrics - Eric Clapton

2009-09-22T14:25:00.000-07:00

I rediscovered this song a couple of days back, by rediscover what I mean is that I had heard it a long time ago and I forgot about it. Somehow I heard it again last week and it blew me away. Eric Clapton is one of those legends whose live performances exceed even the studio versions of their songs. If you haven't heard much of Eric Clapton please go ahead and take a look at this video - Eric Clapton on stage singing Layla

Here are the lyrics of this amazing song:

What'll you do when you get lonely
And nobody's waiting by your side?
You've been running and hiding much too long.
You know it's just your foolish pride.

Layla, you've got me on my knees.
Layla, I'm begging, darling please.
Layla, darling won't you ease my worried mind.

I tried to give you consolation
When your old man had let you down.
Like a fool, I fell in love with you,
Turned my whole world upside down.

Chorus

Let's make the best of the situation
Before I finally go insane.
Please don't say we'll never find a way
And tell me all my love's in vain.

Chorus

Chorus

Stop offering me a smoke!

2009-09-20T12:00:00.000-07:00

Ok, this happened about an hour back. I had just narrated an incident that took place in Magarpatta City where, one day I was chilling on the benches at the ground floor of Tower XII when a gentleman, very kindly, but unnecessarily offered me a smoke, which I declined, simply because I Do Not Smoke!

Then we finish our dinner at Shisha an hour or so ago and were standing near the exit when a random gentleman - can you guess it - offers me a smoke!!! WTF!!!

I am so sorry kind smoke-sharing men of Pune, I do not smoke!!! Period. The next guy who offers me a smoke is really going to have it from me. So please keep your precious slow poison kits to yourself, I do not smoke!

Bose

2009-09-19T11:50:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I bought a BOSE headphone last week, it was delivered ahead of time and I heard some of my favorite songs on it. It is AWESOME! Honestly, it is unbelievably good. No song will sound as good on any other headphone. I recommend it to everyone who is a crazy enough music lover to spend some extra cash and buy it. True, it is costly, but if you love something you can't put a price on it. Music is one thing I love, and Bose is my medium to connect!

Magazine Chronicles - Episode 3 - Plans

2009-09-07T00:35:00.000-07:00

My final article for the college magazine, as always a light and occasionally humorous read :)

---------------------------------------------------

Plans

Harshvardhan L Pande
B Tech
Computers

“Look at these guys, they look so happy”, she said to me; pointing to a bunch of FY students who had just had their first day in college. We looked at them, then looked at each other and laughed. “Bechare, they don’t know what’s in store for them”, she said again. Quite frankly, neither did me. It was the last year of my engineering course. I had finished luckily with my placement work. I won’t say which company I got placed in, but let’s just say I’ll be above the poverty line even in the richest country in the world!

We were both placed in the same company; we were both in the same class, the same batch. I was pretty sure in the last few weeks that she meant a lot to me. But I didn’t know what to do. My male friends always had some advice to give –

“Just go ahead and say it man…” [Yeah, it’s very simple isn’t it? Why don’t I just hold a placard and stand in front of her house today?]
“See a man always has to take the first step…” [No wonder there were no girls sent along with Neil Armstrong to the moon]
“Dude, you have to do it, so just do it…” [I’m not too sure whether he was referring to the same thing as I was]
“Arrey you don’t know girls yaar…” [Oh really, and you are a PhD. On Female Psychology]
“All you’ve got to do is sweep them off their feet…” [Do I need a broomstick to do that?]

What was weird was that these guys who knew so much about girls; they were all single!

Time flew by, the semester was soon over. She started her project work; so did I. We went out very often in a group, but never together. If I was feeling the pressure of time, I didn’t show it, but my friends didn’t make it easy –

“Man, these college days are all you can use to enjoy, don’t wait too long…” [I wasn’t aware that life ended after college, but thanks for the tip]

But somehow even I got the feeling that I was running out of time. I had to do something, but what? So I did the next best thing, I took advice from girls. “All you have to do is impress her!” said one of her close friends, who swore secrecy about the matter. “How do I do that?” I asked. “Think of what you’re really good at” she said.

That night I went through my entire life, finding out what I was really good at. I tried singing, but I woke up the neighbors’ dog, he started barking. I then looked at a poster of Led Zeppelin on the wall, my heart sank; I couldn’t play the guitar either. For that matter I couldn’t play any musical instrument. I could whistle quite well, but somehow I couldn’t imagine myself impressing a girl by whistling. In fact I don’t think anyone in the history of mankind has done that.

All of a sudden my eyes fell upon a book lying on my study table; it was a book on Software Engineering. It had this part in which any successful software development has some stages –

Communication
Planning
Modeling
Construction
Deployment

Now, I had an EX grade in this subject and was pretty good at it. I quickly got a pen and a book and jotted down my action plan.

Step 1 – Communication
The next day, when we met, I asked her a whole lot of questions; her favorite color, cuisine, clothing, music… surprisingly I gathered a lot of information I didn’t know in all these 4 years.

Step 2 – Planning
I decided what I had to do and drew up a plan, the kind of gifts I would buy her, the place I would take her out to for dinner on the night I planned to ask the question and also went to that restaurant and made arrangements with the manager for special treatment for us on THE NIGHT.

Step 3 – Modeling
I optimized my own look in the week approaching THE NIGHT.

Step 4 – Construction
I didn’t need to construct anything, so I didn’t!

Step 5 – Deployment
I asked her out for the evening, she agreed. I borrowed my friend’s car for the evening, she was surprised. The moment she entered the car, on the dashboard was a nice gift wrapped present for her. She liked it a lot. The plan was working. We reached the place, the waiter held the door for us, it was an Italian restaurant. The manager called her “Ma’am” and addressed me as “Sir” and specially designated an exclusive waiter for our table. I made a mental note of giving a hefty tip at the end of the night. She was a little surprised about the whole thing, which was a good thing. As the night went on I gained in confidence, but each time I was about to say the 3 magic words, I had the urge to drink water.

ME: Hey listen, I wanted to tell you something…
SHE: What is it?
ME: Ummm… [picking up my glass] gulp… The food is pretty good isn’t it?

Then finally I decided to man up. I pushed away my glass and moved my chair ahead.

ME: Listen; there was a reason why I asked you to come here tonight.
SHE: Uh, huh…
ME: I have to tell you something
SHE: What?
ME: It’s like this, from quite some time I’ve had this thought… and I’ve never had the chance to tell you and it’s high time I told you…

All of a sudden her mobile rang. “Hi maa, yeah I know it’s getting late. I’ve just finished dinner… Will be home in 20 minutes… bye”

SHE: Hey, I need to get back home now. What were you saying…

The next morning I woke up really late. I didn’t even go to college that day. I couldn’t execute the plan; after her mom broke my momentum I just couldn’t go ahead and complete the quest. It was over.

The rest of the weeks went off without any major incident. I completed my engineering. The next time I met her in college was at the convocation. There we were in the graduation dress. We were clicking snaps and stuff, then there was this moment, we were about to the leave the gates of the college. Both of us were on our bikes. The others had left; it was just the two of us. “So that’s it then, the moment we leave the gates college life will officially end!” she said to me. “Yeah” I said, looking at her. “What’s the matter?” she said, sensing that something was on my mind. I got off my bike, put in on the side stand. “There’s something I want you to know…”

The next day my Orkut relationship status had changed to committed, so had hers! College life ended on the best possible note.

Magazine Chronicles - Episode 2 - The Interview

2009-09-07T00:25:00.000-07:00

My personal favorite article, because I had written it 6 months before giving my first interview and I was quite surprised as to how accurately I got the process and mood ;)

-------------------------

The Interview
Harshvardhan L Pande
502037
T.Y. B. Tech
Computers

It was the biggest day of my life; my very first interview. The last few days had been very hectic, solving loads of aptitude test papers, going through Complete Reference for the third consecutive time. Herb Schildt was my best friend along with Balagurusamy and a host of other people who took pleasure in writing computer books that just refused to fit in my college bag. All the grades and exams and aptitude tests were now to be tested one on one with the interviewers.
I had a hurried breakfast and left home. Riding a bike, my friends, is not as much fun when its raining and you have to reach dry and looking good for an interview. The Raincoat – I think they call it by that name because it is as good as wearing a coat of rain. The thing is that while it pretends to save you from the rain, it actually has planned a diabolical conspiracy to wet your clothes and shoes while you take it off! The Raincoat Gods didn’t spare me that day.
My well combed hair was in utter disarray. It’s funny how your own body works against you when you need it the most! My own hair was conspiring against me. I tried to urge them to get set, but no they wouldn’t budge, it was only after I used my trusted ally – the comb – that they fell in place [a few hair fell off onto my comb, but baldness was not an issue for me that day].
I found my friends, sitting together, going through important questions. I sat with them for an hour listening intently to questions that were “sure shot”! Well, not a single one of them was asked. The interviewers had “surely shot” them off their questionnaires.
Then finally I was asked to enter the room where the interview was to take place. Then after 5 minutes I was informed that I had to go back, because they’ve gone for lunch. Here, my future was at stake and those people were interested in a free lunch. The HR finally arrived. As always the HR was a deceptively beautiful person. Deceptive because as calming as she seemed externally, I knew inside she was waiting to destroy me and tear me to shreds. I sat down on the chair. She went through my resume. Here’s a part of our conversation.
HR: So you got 93% in HSC?
Me: Yes ma’am. [I wanted to say, “No I forged my marksheet, I actually got 71%, watcha gonna do about it!”]

HR: Why do you want to work in this company?
Me: Because I think it is a great organization with a great reputation and would nurture my talents to a higher level, while giving me an opportunity to grow in the corporate field [Yeah, right! You want to know the truth, the stock of this company is out of the roof, I’m gonna be richer than all my cousins and that elusive XBOX 360 will be mine with my first salary, not to mention the latest cell phone and who knows, a new bike]

HR: What are your strengths and weaknesses?
Me: My strengths are that I am diligent, zealous, honest and a hard worker. As far as my weaknesses are concerned, I’ve so far removed them as soon as I found them. [I nailed that answer, all thanks to www.interviewsfordummies.com, of course, the HR never found out that it always took me an hour to get a simple linked list node to work correctly, but who cares?]

HR: In your project, what role did you play?
Me: Well, we had divided the work equally and I was able to do my designing and coding modules well within the stipulated time frame. I was very comfortable working with a team. [Actually, I had to do most of the work in the last 3 days… I’ll never work with those idiots in my group again]

HR: Where do you see yourself 5 years from now?
Me: I aim to be an asset to this company. [I’ll definitely do better than you]

HR: All the answers you’ve given have been satisfactory, but somehow you’ve been very politically correct, almost like clichés. Am I right?
Me: Ahhhh… Ummmm… Ahhh… [Dammit, even she visits www.interviewsfordummies.com]

The HR started laughing, “Relax, I was only joking”. Thank God, I said mentally. I just realized how fast my heart was beating. I was very close to my first ever heart attack. Just then I had a weird thought in my head. What if I got a heart attack and wrote a note before dying that the HR was responsible, would she go to jail?

HR: Do you have any questions?
Me: No. [Excuse me ma’am, if I had a heart attack just now would you go to jail for culpable homicide not amounting to murder? No… Oh, then I don’t think I’d like to have a heart attack and die!]

After the HR round I went through for the technical, I won’t bore you with that stuff, because what transpired in there would only be of interest to Herb Schildt and Balagurusamy, because they didn’t write anything in their 1000’s of pages that would remotely have helped me that day]
But then after the technical I was out again in the room nearby, waiting with the rest of the herd.

I’ll cut to the chase; I got that job, more because of my ability and brains rather than Uncle Herb’s textbook. I went on to buy more than a cell phone and the XBOX. My fear of HR’s also reduced a bit and am glad to be working for this company, because they have a great work ethic. [And an ever increasing stock] Good luck with your interview!

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Magazine Chronicles - Episode 1 - How I Met Natalie

2009-09-07T00:16:00.000-07:00

So here I am, a couple of months into my first job, creatively I haven't suffered much, but I sure am going through a time crunch, I haven't had the time to write new material on this blog. But I also just decided to go through with publishing all the articles I had ever written for the magazine on this blog, one at a time. So here goes -

How I met Natalie…

Harshvardhan L. Pande.
S.Y.B. Tech [Computers]

I was traveling alone and had completed the security checks at the domestic airport. The new millennium had ushered in a lot of changes, one of them being a quirk of fate which made traveling by domestic airlines cheaper than a long train journey from Delhi to Pune.

As I struggled to push my suitcase and bag, I reached the passenger lounge. It was surprisingly empty except for the sole seat occupied by a young and attractive blonde woman.

I stopped to check my appearance and arrived at the conclusion that there was nothing that could make me look worse than I already was; a very positive thought! I started walking again, but with a bit of style, the way a hero walks in a slow-motion scene in Hindi films. She was reading a magazine and was about ten feet away when, I stumbled and fell [this time nothing was in slow-mo!] My bag fell open, just to add to my misery, the blonde woman was looking straight at me!

Why God, why? I asked myself, why didn’t she look while I walked stylishly like Robert Redford and Sean Connery, and why was she staring now when I was on all fours? Where was my “dudeness” and machismo when I needed it? Anyways, moving on; I quickly got up and collected my stuff. I walked upto her and said, “May I sit here please?” “Sure”, she replied without even looking away from the magazine.

My flight was still half an hour away, which gave me time enough to at least talk to the very attractive (as I realized with a closer look) blonde. What should I ask her? Should I ask her name or which country she came from? Nah, that’d be too personal. Maybe I should start with… “So you’re an engineering student?” the blonde asked, suddenly breaking the silence. How the hell did she know? “Yeah” I said… dammit, why’d my voice crack? “How do you know that?” I asked, this time my voice was firm, almost to the extent of overcompensating. “I read the title of one of your books, Engineering Mathematics III, when you fell down” she said. “Stupid question”, my brain said to me. Five minutes passed by and not a single word was said. Well, I thought, there’s no way I can be more embarrassed than I already am; so why not make some conversation?

“My name is…” I introduced myself and told her in which college I studied. Finally she put the magazine away and said, “I’m Natalie Schneider, I work for Reuters.” We shook hands.

Reuters??? Reuters??? Reuters??? Where have I read that word?

“I was in Jaipur, to see the forts and do some research on them, now I’m headed to Mumbai and from there, I’ll be going back home” she continued talking.

Reuters??? Reuters??? Reuters??? God, I know it’s something important! Oh, please God, help me out here! She must not think that I’m stupid and that I don’t even know what Reuters is! The seconds were ticking away and I had to say something. “Reuters, huh? Must be great working for Reuters?” I said, trying to bide some time. “Yeah, it’s really exciting. This is my first outdoor report, you see” she said. “So where are you headed?” she threw another question at me.

Reuters??? Reuters??? Reuters, got it! “I’m headed for Pune, you know, Oxford of the East. How long have you been working for Reuters, the great French news agency?” I said, emphasizing the last part of the sentence. “Just about a year” she said and then smiled.

What a great smile… stop… maintain eye contact, my mind said to me. Reluctantly, I obeyed. “What about you and your college?” she asked. I told her about my family and about my college, COEP. I harped on the fact that it was one of the top ranked colleges of India! She gave me an appreciative look and then smiled again. Thank you God, for putting me in COEP! I thought as my mind drifted onto “day-dream-land”. “Tell me more about engineering in India?” she asked as she shifted her position to face me. Maintain eye contact! Those three words kept replaying in my head. Then I started narrating my engineering experiences like some wounded soldier recounting his wartime stories. I added a lot of humour to increase the interest value, she laughed a lot at the standard engineering jokes; a very good sign.

“… and after the submissions come the vivas! Somehow, the external examiner always asks questions that have no answer. It’s only after the viva is over, that you feel prepared for giving a viva!” She laughed again. I would’ve patted myself on the back for doing such a great job.
“You’re a very interesting guy” she said. Don’t blush, you’re a guy, don’t blush… its not as though you haven’t been complemented by a gorgeous French woman before… actually, it is the first time… alright, just don’t embarrass yourself! Once again I was talking to myself, but I realized soon enough, my cheeks were as red as apples. Lets face it, I was having a great time. But as usual, good times aren’t very long lasting for engineers… my flight had landed at the runway. “Its time for me to go” I said, trying to hide my disappointment. “Have a nice flight” Natalie said. We shook hands again. All of a sudden, her cell phone rang; she got a notepad and a pen from her purse and scribbled something. I saw what she was writing. She wrote…Hotel Le Meridien, Room No. 607, COEP – 2 miles. “My boss just called. He wants me to do a story in Pune, focusing on student exchange possibilities with colleges in India and France. I’ll have to stay in Pune for ten days. Which college did you say you’re in?” she asked.

Ten minutes later I was on my flight, I had her cell number, she had mine. She was going to get in touch with me the next day. I had agreed to show her around the city. Thank you Reuters and I love engineering!

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Wake Up Sid - Music Review - Nice

2009-08-29T11:57:00.000-07:00

I just heard all the songs from this movie. And they're all nice.

I don't think this album is a chart topper or a dance floor scorcher. But it's really nice. Not one song in the album is bad. Every song is nice. I'm overusing the word nice, but then that's what this album is - nice!

This is the kind of album which rules when you're either working late alone, or on a long drive at night. Seriously, just some nice soft tracks like Iktaara can make your mood.

I'm really looking forward to this movie!

Kaminey

2009-08-20T12:54:00.000-07:00

I won't spare a single sentence on saying anything to those who criticize the quality of the movie, yes it is possible that you didn't LIKE this movie, it may not be your type. But if anyone thinks that this movie is over-hyped or not as good as people say it is, well... I can't give sight to the blind now, can I? So why even try?

Kaminey is the definition of an awesome movie, killer acting, killer music, killer story-telling and killer dialogues. By now you should know the story of the movie so I wont bother going there, but it's the way it has been shown that sets this apart and puts it right up to the rank of BEST MOVIE OF THE YEAR. This movie will steal all the awards, trust me.

Cheesy love stories may still strike gold at the box office, but it's movies like Kaminey that raise the bar of Indian cinema and what's more it's set the box office on fire as well. This is a non-stop entertainer which requires a decent IQ to be understood or rather a will to be able to hang on and grasp what the director is trying to convey. There is no spoon-feeding in this flick, no wasted scene in which nothing of consequence happens, every scene has a purpose. What's more, we have Shahid Kapoor as Charlie in what will go down in history as one of the best written roles. The movie hasn't even released full pelt in Pune and people are talking in Charlie ftyle.

Bhope Bhau is brilliantly played by Amol Gupte, his scene with Mikhail played by Chadan Roy Sanyal is exceptionally awesome. The craziness of that scene is something I have seen on screen after a really long time.

The climax - I won't write a thing about the story since you absolutely must watch this movie, but believe me, if you watch the climax carefully and dont let yourself get distracted with all the action you will notice so many twists and turns it is mind-blowing.

Finally, praise for the man who practically owns this film, Vishal Bharadwaj, man, thank God you became a director and came up with this movie. I know there's practically no chance of you reading this blog post but seriously I am still trying to wonder how you can come up with such an incredible storyline, such brilliant dialogues and the perfect soundtrack to go with the brilliant movie. Be prepared for a showering of awards in the next awards season. This is one movie which people just cant pass over as one that gets a CRITICS award. This one gets them all.

I could go on forever in praise of this movie, it is that good. But I need to stop and go watch the movie again. So, please go ahead and watch this movie. Iff movie ko miff mat karna!

Covers

2009-08-09T10:15:00.000-07:00

I'm a music lover, a lot of my spare time is spent listening to songs - old and new. This post is about two songs which I really like and their covers which are completely new takes on the originals and add to the originals.

1. All along the watchtower - This is one of the most incredibly simple songs, originally composed and sung by Bob Dylan and then covered by Jimi Hendrix. Just thinking about this is makes me envy the people living in the 60's. Imagine the quality of music back then - Jimi Hendrix covering Bob Dylan's song. Amazing!

2. Heartless -Heard this song way back in Jan or something and liked it a lot. Then recently I heard the cover by The Fray, which was a completely different take on the song, acoustic. It's on my playlist as I write this. I don't know how many people are into this type of music, but give it a shot if you have the time.

Boston Legal

2009-07-31T15:51:00.001-07:00

Boston Legal is the latest addition to my all-time-favorites list. It takes a lot of consistency to get onto that sort of a list in anyone's case, and this show is right on top of the list. If you need proof of it's awesomeness, read this: In its five-year run, it was nominated for 25 Emmy Awards, winning seven times.

For those of you who need an introduction to this show, here you are:

It's about the lives of legal attorneys at a leading law firm called Crane Poole and Schmidt in Boston. The main characters are Alan Shore, played by the brilliant James Spader and Denny Crane, played awesomely by the scene stealer William Shatner, who long long ago used to play Captain Kirk in the original Star Trek series which I used to religiously watch in some years ago, when TV was really worth watching.

The other characters of the show are also quite interesting, but Denny and Alan totally rule the show. Each episode has one or two major trials going on and they're all interesting and fun. Denny Crane is supreme and delivers his punchlines every time brilliantly, you never tire of hearing him say "Denny Crane".

By the end of each episode the trials come to a close and you get to see whether Alan and Denny win or lose. The last scene in almost each episode shows Denny and Alan chilling on their office balcony and discussing stuff, it's quite a different style of ending an episode. The women in the firm are mostly hot, then men are funny, the lines are hilarious and above all those two magic words - Denny Crane!

Just watch this show, I am quite positive you'll like it. I for one love it. It's right up there for me with Seinfeld and House.

How I Spent July

2009-07-31T15:48:00.000-07:00

July 2009, a month where a lot of stuff happened. First full month at work. A lot happens in a month, you - make new friends, strengthen old friendships, watch new movies, get addicted to Boston Legal, learn to say Denny Crane to those who watch and love the show like you do, fall sick, recover, get back to work, have insane fun on weekends, slog like a dog on weekdays, play TT in office and occasionally win, spend a lot of your own money in a matter of hours and get surprised about the fact that you don't really care, feel proud that your life isn't tied to money, then realize that you aren't a lunatic in terms of spending cash when you discover the word 'savings', start detecting fraudulent finance agents and ignoring them, watch Megan Fox and renew your pledge of going to the US and other developed countries especially France [Laetitia Casta reigns supreme], switch from fun mode to work mode and vice versa, hear MJ songs and watch his videos and acknowledge once again his musical genius and supremacy in live performances, toy around with ideas of Bose headphones and new cellphones and then reject the ideas for the time being, spend hours on the Laptop even at home just because it's new and you can access the net from the balcony and chat/talk with people at the wee hours of the morning and watch the pre-dawn sky, utilize every bit of the awesome Airtel broadband connection, read the newspaper while having breakfast before going to office like a professional, come to grips with cab music, catch up with age old friends, sleep off Sundays and then realize that you don't suffer from the I-hate-Mondays syndrome, have pizzas for free at office, pay for pizzas at home, watch England kick Aussie ass for a change and enjoy every bit of it, realize that your next David Flabbergaster post is one day away, have a tough time describing how the days are flying by when at one time they used to crawl at a snail's pace, go to sleep after writing a rare simple blog post with no humor it.

David Flabbergaster: Realizations of most professionals

2009-07-08T22:22:00.000-07:00

The following quotes are a compilation of experiences of many people who have shared them with the greatest engineer ever - David Flabbergaster.

1. The probability of a good song being played in a cab is lower than that of a 100 year old man lifting a bulldozer using only his fake teeth.

2. The biggest question in a professional's life is - will today's lunch be worth the walk to the canteen?

3. There are areas in every office which are as cold as Siachen

4. Whenever you're actually doing work, very few people notice it, the moment you've just about opened any fun thing, everyone passing buy will notice

5. Hearing music while working is no longer a privilege, it's a way of life

6. Whenever you're in a hurry, the elevators will always be on the furthest floor from the one you're on

There are many more such experiences which David Flabbergaster will share in the future, but right now he has a meeting, in which he has to give a presentation on "Whether office buildings should have escalators in place of lifts - The benefit being that even if a power outage occurs, employees will have no excuse to come late since they can always climb the stairs!"

Kaminey - Music Review

2009-07-07T12:04:00.000-07:00

One of the best albums of 2009, right on top with Dev D and Delhi 6. It's so good to hear some good music again, the kind which isn't made to simply be used as an item song or a 'phooljhadi hit' like the title track of a movie which was trying so hard to do a repeat of Hare Ram that they used a Hindu shloka as part of the song!

Kaminey has some great songs by Vishal Bharadwaj.

The best tracks of the album are:

1. Dhan Te Nan - I especially like the remix version, which accentuates the beats. It's an absolute dance scorcher, which I am sure will be played in all discos and parties.

2. Fatak - Grows on you after repeated listening and then you just love it.

3. Go Charlie Go - Brilliant haunting theme sound!

4. Raat Ke Dhai Baje - The entire song is just ok, until the third minute, when it takes a different direction and sounds really good.

5. Pehli Baar Mohabbat - Insanely awesome melody, sung by Mohit Chouhan who does it only like he can.

6. Kaminey - The song is simply amazing!

So in my view, the best songs of this movie are Go Charlie Go, Kaminey, Pehli Baar Mohabbat and Dhan Te Nan. Go listen to this album. I hope the movie is just as good as the music. Kudos to you Vishal Baradwaj!

P.S. - Listening to these songs in my brand new headphones just raises the bar a notch higher :)

Some of the best stuff on this blog

2009-07-06T03:01:00.000-07:00

Can an Engineer go to heaven... ever?

Incidents 2

Original Quotes

The New Text Document.txt Incident

The Pen Is..

This one had to be on the blog

Oh Great Throat Virus/Bacteria/Germ I Bow To Thee

Public Declaration

The Secret Theorem

How to fake it

Incidents

Weirdest Village Name

Harsh Pande's Theorem of Periodic rise in Marks a.k.a. The 5 minute Theorem

The extent of copying I deem hazardous

The Aphrodisiacs of today

Reco Letter

Who is David Flabbergaster?

Dont bathe with your mobile

The all knowing virgins

Passing the parcel incident

Magazine Chronicles - Episode 1 - How I Met Natalie

Magazine Chronicles - Episode 2 - The Interview

Magazine Chronicles - Episode 3 - Plans

David Flabbergaster: Realizations of Most Professionals

Pehli Pehli Pagaar Hai, Pehli Pehli Baar Hai

Pehli Pehli Pagaar Hai, Pehli Pehli Baar Hai

2009-07-01T12:17:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the lame title for the post, but there's something about salary and job terms in Hindi which is just missing in the English translation. For e.g. Salary and Employee just don't have the down and dirty feel to it as words like 'pagaar' and 'karmchaari' have :P

So as an honest and diligent karmchaari, that I hope I am, it gives me great pleasure to tell you that I along with a host of fellow karmchaaris of various companies got their pagaar today, which was evident from so many of them putting it up on their gtalk status msg's almost saying, "Yeah people, that's right, go ahead and ask me for a treat!"

Now let me tell you, in an honest and completely non-sarcastic way that yes, it is a great feeling to earn your first ever pay. It feels awesome and has a different sense of fullfillment to it. Now I really didn't feel any anticipation or any such thing and just calmly read the message which told me how I had now got some cash with me which gave me a chance to finally stop applying for the Indira Gandhi National Urban Employment Guarantee Scheme! But I didn't take it too seriously, all of a sudden there were all these people with their status messages having changed. It went to such an extent that if one didn't have a status saying "Got my first sal" or "First sal feels awesome" or something like that, it almost meant that you didn't get yours. Well, so before someone asked me "Dude, u didnt get ur salary or wat?" I decided to put up my own declaration of financial independence on gtalk!

Anyways then started the whole "kitna mila" routine followed by the usual "confidential hai" reply. But the real meaning of the term first salary was felt when I returned home and saw the joy on my family members' faces, that's when I realized what it means, being an earning member of the house, well it's like what Spiderman's Uncle told him "With great power comes great responsibility"! It's great to have the power to buy what you want, go where you want; but it's also a responsibility to buy the right things and to go to the right places.

So I went to the best place and bought the best thing possible, I went to Chang's [my fave joint in Viman Nagar] and bought the best dishes they had on offer ;)

So people, that's the story of my first sal, i.e. the story so far!

Updates

2009-06-27T14:41:00.000-07:00

Well, it's been an immensely productive week for me, having done things in a varied spectrum like work, singing, chilling, dancing, eating to the point of exploding, very little sleeping and movie watching.

As usual, no professional details out here, so sorry folks!

I saw Terminator Salvation today morning, the theatre had quite a lot of rush which surprised me since I thought only my friends and I are cheapos who would wake up for the 9 am movie after having slept at close to 3 am, moreover it was a Saturday. One reason I guess is the long multiplex strike which starved the movie going junta of our country to check out as many movie asap, since the strike is over now. I really think a lot of the upcoming and just released movies have a great chance to do really great business - Kambakht Ishq already seems like a blockbuster waiting to release [the no. of times I hear the title track while traveling around town is impossible to imagine].
Then Love Aaj Kal also seems destined to rule the box office, as much as I despise Saif Ali Khan it's really hard to imagine how a movie by Imtiaz Ali starring Deepika Padukone could flop.

Then we have Kaminey, from the promos its evident that it is yet another quality product from Vishal Bharadwaj; I hope it gets box office success in a big way.

Anyways, so much for movies; let's get back to some updates.

The most awesome even of the week by far was the Gala Dinner that my company hostel for us at The O Hotel. The crowd was awesome, the music was great. I danced like mad for an hour and had the most fun possible. Loads of other awesome stuff happened that night, which I wont tell on a blog [dont worry, it isnt what you're probably thinking], but it was a lot of fun.

Apart from that I'm busy meeting friends on weekends and working my ass off on weekdays, not as bad as it sounds :)

Music in the Cab

2009-06-21T09:08:00.000-07:00

If any of you guys travel by cab, i.e. a company cab I'm sure you will be able to identify with this post. The following are some masterpieces I've heard over the last 5 days:

1. O Hawa, O Hawa Khusboo Lutade [a song i hrd for the 1st time in this milennium :D ]
2. Hai Rama Yeh Kya Hua kyu aise hamein sataney lage
3. The return of Himesh [right from ooooo oooo ooooo Aashiq banaya to Jhooth Nahin Bolna]

It keeps getting better and better :D
Gets you all stirred up for work!

Meeting Anupam Kher and Shweta Tiwari

2009-06-20T14:56:00.000-07:00

I was at The O Hotel on all five weekdays for a reason which only those who should know, do know. [I love the suspense created in the minds of those who don't know ;) ]

And on two occasions I had a chance encounter with the above named celebrities, the first happened on Monday morning at breakfast at The O, when suddenly a certain gentleman sitting next to me said to another colleague of mine that he can see Shweta Tiwari. Now I don't watch the K serials on TV and hence had no clue of what the big deal was, anyways I glanced around and yep, it was her.

But the real fun incident happened two days later, my friend and I were done with the days work and were headed for the lift. We had to wait for the lift and finally when it opens, guess who's standing in it? Anupam Kher!

Respecting celebrity privacy, I wont tell you what transpired between the three of us in the lift in our very brief meeting, but it was a huge surprise for me and my friend. Anupam Kher seemed like a perfect gentleman and looked really fair and taller than I had imagined.

Lesson learned, next time you go to The O Hotel, do carry an autograph book, you just might meet someone at breakfast or in the lift!

P.S. For the next three days, my friend and I were chanting Laetitia Casta after calling the lift :D

Policy Decision

2009-06-20T14:52:00.000-07:00

Ok, after giving this some thought over the past few days I have come to a decision that I will not, and absolutely not, post anything about my professional life, which begun last week.
It's best to keep this blog away from any professionalism, it's a blog meant for fun and that is what it will remain, just with the constraint that no experiences from my professional life shall be written here or anywhere for that matter.

However the past and present is up for grabs. So there we go!

Random Rickshaw Incident

2009-06-12T08:50:00.000-07:00

This happened today, Julka and I were going to leave from Sweet Chariot Cafe and were looking for a rickshaw. We finally spotted an empty one across the road and shouted and said "Viman Nagar". The rickshaw driver says "Ok". So we get in and he turns in the wrong direction and carries on. Julka asks him "kahaan jaa rahe ho bhaiyya" so he says "Deep Bangla Chowk se lunga". Neither of us gave much importance to it and he carried on. Julka then got off midway and left. I carried on.

Throughout the way I'm having this WTF feeling as i have no recollection of the road we're travelling on. So i tell the driver, "Bhaiyya yeh raasta barabar hai kya? Kabhi is rastey aaya nahi". So he says, "Raasta barabar hai, in fact yeh shortcut hai". So I'm like "ok!". Then on the turn ahead he says, "Idhar se left leneka ki right?". I get mind fucked, and say "Aapko nahi pata kya ki idhar se kaise jaatey hain". He says "kya saab, aapka ghar kidhar hai yeh aapko malum hona chahiye, hum correct area mein pahuch gaye hain, Hanuman Nagar!"

I'm like WTF WTF WTF!!! Hanuman Nagar?

I say "Hanuman Nagar kisne bola, mere ko Viman Nagar jaane ka hai!"
He says, "Kya? Viman Nagar"
I'm angry plus kind of feeling like laughing at the stupidity of the whole thing. So the rickshaw driver turns around 180 degrees like only a rickshaw can and starts off. So i thought he'll start bickering about the money and extra distance, instead he goes back to Sweet Chariot and restarts the meter from there!

Anyways basically I got a free darshan of Hanuman Nagar, which until today I didn't even know existed and returned back to Viman Nagar without any financial damage :D

Updates

2009-06-07T09:20:00.000-07:00

I saw Angels and Demons last week, I liked it; in fact I thought it was better directed than The Da Vinci Code.

I visited the college thrice for doing the Leaving Certificate formalities and by God, it takes forever to get those stamps and signatures from people who randomly decide to go on holidays and return just as randomly! But then it's one of the final things to be done in COEP. So chalega!

I then started watching the T20 World Cup and was aghast to see Sanjay Manjrekar as a commentator for ESPN Star, who were the only sports network who had a very high standard of commentators. But then they made up for it by hiring Anil Kumble. But still Sanju Manju sucks.

I then saw Watchmen in theatre and my first reaction was that it wasn't that good. But as i thought about the movie, i started liking it more and more. Now i think it was awesome. My opinion changed because I read the Graphic Novel by Alan Moore. It is freaking awesome!

Even when I saw the flick without having read the book, I was extremely into the characters of Dr. Manhattan and Rorschach. Silk Spectre II looked good and acted well enough with and without her costume ;) I didn't like Nite Owl II in the movie but after reading the novel I realized that the character was played to the tee. So 8/10 to Watchmen. It may not be your cup of tea unless your into serious and dark story telling!

I also happened to have an amazingly random and weird enounter one night after a treat which was so out of the world that I still cant believe it happened. If we happen to meet do remind me to tell you about the Fight That Never Was involving The Drunk Red Army Uncle. I cant blog about it and you'll know why once you hear it! But it was hilarious!

And now for the latest dumb update : A couple I know was chatting with a heart shaped sign i.e. "<3" as their status msg! It's the baap of Public Display of Affection!

I haven't had the time to blog that much and I don't forsee myself having too much blogging time in the near future so read some of my older stuff if you're really bored in life!

Until we meet again!

4 things I wanted to do but couldn't and why

2009-05-27T23:55:00.000-07:00

1. Vote. Couldn't do that coz my name wasn't in the voter's list!

2. Wanted to shoot Mandira and co. for the crappy IPL coverage. Couldn't because the bullets were too costly to be wasted on trash.

3. Start a Sitcom on engineering. Couldn't because I realized that engg tales are more suitable for epic tragedies than comedies.

4. Threesome with Laetitia Casta and Monica Bellucci. Couldn't because I didn't have time in my busy schedule.

Hemant Kumar's Best

2009-05-26T06:31:00.000-07:00

This is a post I've wanted to write since quite sometime, finally found the time to do it. There are few singers of the old days who are still relevant today. Those who still are, like Kishore Kumar, Rafi, Mukesh, Manna De were immensely popular in their times. However, the depth in voice which Hemant Kumar possessed could not be matched by anyone back then or now. Hemant Kumar is probably not as famous as any of the above listed names today, because he didn't do as much work in the Hindi Music Industry as the rest of them. But the two songs which I love of his far surpass those which any of the other legends have sung. The one thing which all the legends had in their songs was more focus on vocals than instruments, that's changed today [there's nothing wrong with it], but it's just that if you go to a live concert of any of the current day singers, you can be surprised by the dip in quality over the studio versions of their songs.

If you haven't heard these 2 songs, please give them a listen immediately:

Tum Pukar Lo from the movie Khamoshi -

Hm hm hm hm
Hm hm hm, hm hm hm

Tum pukar lo, tumhara intezaar hai, tum pukar lo
Khwaab chun rahi hai raat beqarar hai
Tumhara intezaar hai, tum pukar lo

(Honth pe liye hue dil ki baat ham
Jaagte rahenge aur kitni raat ham) -2
Muqtasar si baat hai tum se pyaar hai
Tumhara intezaar hai, tum pukar lo

(Dil bahal to jaayega is khayal se
Haal mil gaya tumhara apne haal se) -2
Raat ye qaraar ki beqarar hai
Tumhara intezaar hai

--------------------------------------------------------------------
The above song I had heard when I was just about 6 years old, that was a time when DD was still a relevant channel on TV. They were showing this brilliant movie called Khamoshi which was a trendsetter in terms of a storyline involving a mental patient and a lady doctor who get romantically involved. If the brilliance of the movie itself wasn't enough, there was this amazing song which just blew me away in terms of lyrics and music which touches your heart. And even at that age I knew I'd continue to love this song for years to come.

__________________________________________________________

Jaane Woh Kaise Log The Jinke Pyar Ko Pyar Mila from the movie Pyaasa

Jaane Woh Kaise Log The Jinke Pyar Ko Pyar Mila

Humne To Jab Kaliyaan Maangi Kaaton Ka Haar Mila

Bichhad Gayaa Har Saathi Dekar Pal Do Pal Ka Saath
Kisko Phursat Hai Jo Thaame Deewane Ka Haath
Humko Apna Saaya Tak Aqsar Bezaar Mila
Humne To Jab...

Isko Hi Jeena Kehte Hain To Yunhi Ji Lenge
Uf Na Karenge Lab See Lenge Aansoo Pee Lenge
Gham Se Ab Ghabraana Kaisa Gham Sau Baar Mila
Humne To Jab...

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

This song from Guru Dutt's masterpiece Pyaasa is a classic. I love it far more than the other classic in this movie "Yeh Duniya Agar Mil Bhi Jaaye To Kya Hai".

I salute this brilliant singer and music composer.

The Perfect Ten

2009-05-23T16:52:00.000-07:00

Ok, I have never till date written a blog post about any semester result. But then something happened on the 23rd of May 2009, which doesn't happen that often. I understood what one means by the term "The Perfect Ten". As always I wont divulge any personal details on the blog, but those who should know, will understand what this post is about.

I owe a huge debt to some of the best seniors in the world, who I have always bugged with mostly unnecessary doubts and queries, but who have always patiently answered all of them. So thank you guys.

A very big thank you to Akash and Mrunal, my B Tech project partners. And above all a huge thank you to the Almighty, the Lord of all GPAs ;)

And now that I am officially an Engineer, I am free to post about any past experience, so do expect some insane stories from my engineering days :)

Mijuk

2009-05-08T16:36:00.000-07:00

I saw this hilarious thing on TV, where the legendary Bappi Da was talking on one of those Talent Contest shows, i think it was on ZEE. He said this -

"Mijuk is Laaab, Mijuk is Laaaife, Mijuk is Soul, Every-bhaan needs is the Mijuk in Laaaife!"

Bappi Da was spreading gyaan about Mijuk i.e. Music :D :D :D

Later that day I saw a repeat telecast of The Great Indian Comedy Show where they had made a spoof of Bappi Da on the same Mijuk dialogue! Insanely funny stuff.

I laaab mijuk!

David Flabbergaster Is Back

2009-05-07T03:42:00.001-07:00

Some more random quotes and stuff from the legend himself:

I may not know how to write an SQL Query, or how to make a webpage, or how to write code in C or Java or any other language, but I do know how to make programs run... and sometimes in life, that's all you need to do!

The only reason for a guy to cry at a farewell party in his Engg college isn't nostalgia - it's if he walks in for refreshments and realizes all the drinks are gone and there's no food left.

I looked into her eyes, she looked at mine, she smiled at me, I smiled at her, then she asked me if I had some change, I told her No and the signal turned green and we never met again.

The people you have harmed in your previous life will come back to haunt you in your current life by trying to destroy you every year - we know them as THE EXTERNAL EXAMINER

I look at the sex ratio in some states of India and somehow i know that if the old tradition of no inter caste/state marriages continues, there'll be a lot of bachelor dudes left in some parts of the country.

If you ever think Himesh is the worst singer of all time, then please do not forget the legendary Anu Malik, I still shudder when I remember the songs - "My Adorable Darling, I think of you every night every morning" [from Main Khiladi Tu Anari], or the painfully disastrous "Bahar baarish ho rahi hai, it's raining... it's raining... it's raining! Mera Dil Ro Raha hai, it's paining... it's paining... it's paining" [from some God-forsaken album]

I had a nightmare that Megan Fox called on my cell, and it was not reachable!

If anyone ever criticises the summer heat, he's obviously never been to a quality swimming pool, where the sun's rays and good old global warming make women want to wear 2 piece swimming suits!

Dear diary, today I moved from Base 1 to Base 2, it was a lot of fun.
Dear diary, today I moved from Base 2 to Base 3, it was much more fun.
Dear diary, today I finally reached Base 4. What an achievement!
Dear diary, this game of Shaolin Samurai Sword Fight has only 5 bases, it's too short. Damn these demo version games!

Ted Mosby from HIMYM once said the single greatest word in the English dictionary is "YES". Well, he obviously never asked his boss the question - So am I fired?

The Commercialization of Cricket

2009-05-05T15:11:00.000-07:00

"Ati Sarvatra Varjitey" - This is one of the first ever Sanskrit phrases I ever heard, and it totally applies to all aspects of life. I just read a good post by Shirin on her blog and thought of adding some thoughts of my own.

One doesn't need to be a genius to understand that Cricket today has changed, and not every change has been for the best! The author of the post I was referring to hit the nail on the head when she mentioned that people shouldn't start calling a SIX, a DLFer, but it happened during the match between Delhi Daredevils and KKR. It was unbelievable. I had just read the post a few hours back on the above mentioned link and here I was watching a match in which a SIX wasn't called a SIX, not once! It was called a DLF maximum! WTF?

Commercialization of Cricket is going to hurt the game very badly, the quality of what one see's will indeed be affected adversely. In terms of broadcasting, SET MAX literally destroyed the broadcasting fun when they brought on Ruby Bhatia a few years back, and quickly replaced her after she goofed up completely. Then Mandira was unleashed upon this world. I have no issues with her, she's just doing her job. But the problem is, it started a downward trend.
There are now so many channels on air that they've run out of experts. They bring in any unheard of player and call him an expert. Each channel has it's Arun Lal and Maninder Singh [no one I know can remember any significant on-field contribution that they ever made].

Something about TIMES NOW - They have a guy called Boria Muzumdar, who originally started ramming his mouth of on air under the tag of "Cricket historian"! Yeah, right! I know a couple of guys in my college who could quote any score of any match played since they were born, only they haven't figured out a fancy title for themselves and haven't been hired by a channel, yet!
Anyways, now, he is a "Cricket Expert"! We have, hold your breath, Arbaaz Khan, that's right, Arbaaz Khan... the man who starred in blockbusters[?] like "Qayamat" and his views are taken on Sachin Tendulkar's innings and Shane Warne's captaincy.

CNN IBN - These guys at least don't pretend to be serious about their IPL coverage, their show is titled CRICKET TAINMENT. With Cyrus Broacha cracking his, mostly lame joke brand of humor. Anyways, so now we have Cyrus, Arbaaz, Sameer Kocchar and the guy who lost out on Indian Idol, Mayang Chang - covering the IPL. W G Grace, may your soul rest in peace!

The point that the "Mandira" supporters make is, that it sells! Well my friends, it sells because it's what the fools running these channels decide to show us. ESPN STAR is like the shining beacon for us Cricket lovers, they too have had to change a bit because of the ensuing madness that rival channels have started. But look at the people they have in their fold, Sunil Gavaskar, Wasim Akram, Harsha Bhogle, Alan Wilkins - all exceptional commentators and people who can claim to say they know what they are talking about.

I saw this match yesterday in the IPL, where Ranjit Fernando was on air and he delivered this piece of idiotic commentary -

[Batsman slog sweeps... mistimes]

Ranjit - Oh, that has been savagely hit!

[The ball lands just outside the 30 yard circle, talk about savagely hit shots]

Ranjit - He didn't really get too much bat on it.

[WTF]

How the hell did a savagely hit shot, not have too much bat on it?

Anyways there are far worse commentators on air than Ranjit Fernando, but i was just citing an example that came to mind. Another incident involving Mayan Chang comes to mind, the guy is so poor in his Cricket knowledge that he at times forgets team names! Why the hell is he covering a cricket match?
I have nothing against any of the individuals who are named in this post, they're all doing what they've been paid to do, but the point is why, oh why have they been hired?
To a cricket lover who has seen the glory days of Cricket coverage, when Geoff Boycott and Sunil Gavaskar used to deliver brilliant and exciting commentary, for the people who have heard Tony Greg delivering lines like "This little man is the closest thing to Bradman there's ever been" - it's close to torture to watch the insanity that is on AIR. Watching Danny Morrison near the boundary rope with a cheerleader sitting on his lap was utterly distasteful.

Another thing is that, player's who haven't done any great deed in their career are incapable of truly understanding greatness or actually criticizing stupidity.

Case in point - when Buchanan came out with his 4 captain theory, Gavaskar took him on with a scathing attack! Well, now it's clear why Sunil Gavaskar used such strong words to criticize an idea which is fundamentally flawed. KKR is at the bottom of the table and don't look like they're gonna get up at all!

At that time I remember, a pathetic loser of a former cricketer on a news channel saying, "T20 is a game of constant innovation, Gavaskar may be a great batsman, but i think we should accept that the past generation cricketers cannot accept such innovation easily!"
That dimwit didn't realize that Gavaskar was part of the ICC Technical committee which allowed ideas like Free Hits and Bowl Outs to enter the cricketing world. There are times when even these greats make mistakes, no one is perfect. But what sucks is to watch mediocre people act as if they are great experts in the field.

Coming back to the Sanskrit phrase I quoted at the start, it's a fact that there's too much of commercialization taking place in cricket and borrowing a line from Shirin's article, it'll be the death of cricket the day a wicket is no longer called a wicket and instead called a "Citi moment of success"!

Jerry Maguire

2009-04-30T13:49:00.000-07:00

I know I was supposed to write a review for The Bartimaeus Trilogy, but that'll take a while and I frankly am not in the mood to write a book review right now. In the past two days I've returned to what was once my habit, sleeping for just about 4 hours in a day! So as I approach my last subject exam in COEP; I suddenly have decided to write a review of one of my most favorite movies of all time - Jerry Maguire.
This movie is a must watch, brilliant performances by Tom Cruise as Jerry Maguire, Cuba Gooding Jr. as Rod Tidwell and Renée Zellweger as Dorothy Boyd [the only role I ever liked her in] and special mention for the amazing child actor Jonathan Lipnicki as Dorothy's son Ray [he's the same kid who was in Stuart Little]. Apart from this kid and Macaulay Culkin in Home Alone, I have not seen a better performance from a child actor. Seriously! You just have to watch his scene in the car with Tom Cruise with his "Did you know..." dialogues. Amazing scene.

The movies story is pretty simple, Jerry is an agent for Sportsmen in a large firm, he has a moment of career-misjudgment and sends a memo to all employees of the company stating what ails the Sports Agencies in terms of policies and stuff. The result is he gets fired, loses all but 2 clients and has to leave. The only saving grace is Dorothy who comes along with him when he is kicked out, because she believes in his principle. The lift scene which has the famous line "You complete me." is brilliant.

The best part about the movie is Rod Tidwell, in a standout role, which got Cuba Gooding, Jr. an Oscar - he kicks ass in every scene. The movie has brilliant scenes and memorable, catchphrase style lines like

1. Show Me The Money
2. You are my ambassador of Kwan
3. Help me, help you [I love this line]
4. You had me at hello
5. You complete me [brilliantly delivered in the climax scene, more recently used by Heath Ledger as The Joker in the Interrogation scene with Batman in The Dark Knight]

Scenes -

You Complete Me [Jerry Maguire]

You Complete Me [The Joker]

It's no point just watching the scenes of this flick, watch the whole movie and I am quite positive you will like it! Great, clean, heart-touching movie with some memorable scenes peppered with intelligent dialogue.

A still from the famous "Show Me The Money" scene. Tom Cruise gave his best performance till date in this movie. The movie is shot in a very simplistic and natural style giving it a very realistic feel.

The kid is a scene-stealer. Period!

Cuba Gooding, Jr. as Rod Tidwell in the pre-climax scene where his antics on the field turn into a life-changing event for both Jerry and himself!

4/5 for this flick! Do watch it.

Engineering Story - SE Lectures

2009-04-26T11:07:00.000-07:00

This happened in TY. The college had been renovated to a great extent, especially the seminar halls and large rooms like Room No. 6. Anyways we used to have Software Engg (SE) lectures in Room 6 and it was a joint, Comp+IT lecture. It was scheduled for 5.30 and somehow I always used to be hungry at that time, so i had made it a bit of a ritual to give some cash to any friend and ask him to get the following from the BC while I crossed over to Room No. 6 -

1. Appy
2. Samosa
3. Lays or any other snacks

This carried on for many weeks. It was nice fun, to have Prof. Kelkar [or some similar name] yap in IIT-Powai while I had my fill. The room was nice and comfy, I had setting with "the dude, who snooped around to catch people talk". Interestingly a guy from my class was once thrown out of the lecture for falling from his chair after he fell asleep :D
So now you know I wasn't the only one screwing around with the system during the lecture. There were such Draconian laws in place for that lecture, like, the only Textbooks you could open and read had to be SE books, or else you were shunted out. And not that getting thrown out of the lecture was such a big deal, it was the resultant loss of attendance which bound us to our chairs in that god-forsaken lecture. That Prof also used to crack some lame jokes, e.g. if he was explaining something and he had to give us an example, invariably he would take an example of "buying a saree for ur gf or wife" and his voice had some sinusoidal pattern where in his voice frequency [pitch] would rise and fall. It was hilarious at times!

Anyways back to the main story, so I had my routine set, I would walk in, sit with my friends and have my evening treat. Many times, the guy sitting next to me would be Bhushan. Now that day Bhushan and I were sitting as usual. Only I had a really large treat in store, I had the Appy, Samosa, Lays and a Sandwich. Only, that day Bhushan too brought some "chana" along for his eating pleasure. Now, A. P. Maam was in charge and she's not very nice, to say the least! I skillfully avoided her gaze and had my snack. Then she comes and settles down on the last row of the class. Bhushan has a hunger attack and starts nibbling on his chana. I notice A.P Maam looking on and give Bhushan the warning with my elbow. Too late. She caught him, red-handed with his mouth full of chana :D
He couldn't believe his luck, he was sitting next to a guy who had just eaten half the canteen's menu, while he got caught eating his first fistful of chana!!! That's what you call irony.
That was a fun time, the SE lectures. The tests out there in room 6 were a revelation. I got an EX in SE, one thing I am proud of, even if u wake me up at 4am and ask me to describe the blackbox and whitebox method of testing or the waterfall model, I will be able to tell you :P
Anyways, that didnt deter me or Bhushan from many more "in-lecture treats"!

Voracious Reading Back In Vogue

2009-04-20T06:46:00.000-07:00

There was a time when I was known to be a voracious reader, reading works of Ayn Rand, John Grisham, Jeffrey Archer, J.K. Rowling, Salman Rushdie, Dominic Lapierre, Gregory David Roberts and J.R.R. Tolkien almost one after the other. But then since I entered Final Year, I literally gave up reading because I couldn't find time for it. And now I've come to realize I've got to make time for reading and now I have taken up a challenge for myself - to finish the entire Bartimaeus Trilogy within 1 week. I'll have to juggle my free time between watching the IPL and my end sem exams; but then it's high time I did some solid reading.

I swear to give a blog post with a review of all 3 books within a week.

The Aphrodisiacs of Today

2009-04-15T08:18:00.001-07:00

Dammit, all this while I thought that one had to be sensitive, romantic, interesting, courteous etc etc to get a girl's attention, but how wrong I was! Damn this world of books and novels which are filled with hundreds of pages of how a man should struggle to win his damsel's heart. But all that was just trash, i.e. if advertisements are to be believed. Originally it was just AXE and other deodorants who were responsible for enlightening us about how spraying yourself could get you your dream chic. But now others are following suit.
Almost all bike ads now come with the same storyline, guy on the road with his new bike and abracadabra, women go crazy! Weirdest thing in the bike ads is how the girl sitting behind the guy starts causing the background music to change to sensual feminine moans and groans. Damn, and here people read books about technique and stuff to evoke such responses from women.

Then we have the usual, underwear ads; which nowadays are exploring the wild side of the "Bharatiya Nari" types of women, i.e. wearing sarees and stuff... and yes, moaning in the background music.

But the weirdest ad, the one which caused me to write this post was the new Panasonic ad with Ranbir Kapoor. The entire ad focuses on a stream of women entering the guy's house, apparently coz he has an awesome TV. Obviously the women make suggestive gestures and moves, but obviously that was because of the TV and not coz of Ranbir, thats bcoz at the end of the ad, a geeky version of Ranbir gets all the babes after he installs the same TV.

I'm waiting for the day Saffola oil starts asking us to buy their latest low cholestrol oil pack, so that men could get in bed with hot women.
The ad would go like this -

Two men enter a shopping mall, hot chic notices them, First Man buys Dhara or some other brand, woman gives him the thumbs down. Second Man walks and buys Saffola with low cholestrol. Woman smiles and makes suggestive gestures at him, they walk out together, woman looks at screen and says "I like my men with low cholestrol"... screen fades to black, obviously with moaning sounds in the background!

Anyways, the point is that ads are really getting dumber by the day. Aamir Khan's recent Tata Sky ad as an old Sardarji is a welcome change, such ads should be made more often. But marketing is about success, and the only reason that ads involving "moaning background sounds" are becoming the order of the day, is probably because they're more successful.

I'll carry on doing the usual, non-advert style methods of impressing women, i.e. until the day my imaginary Saffola ad is actually aired! That day i'll buy Axe, a new bike, VIP Frenchie, Panasonic TV and finish off with Saffola oil to seduce my chic!

Who is David Flabbergaster?

2009-04-07T13:26:00.000-07:00

Who is David Flabbergaster and why should I read what he has to say?

David Flabbergaster, is a great engineer who like many great engineers, hasn't done anything you've heard of. And you should read what he has to say, because you are here out of choice, obviously, you have nothing better to do!

One day David Flabbergaster decided that he should spread his knowledge to his fellow engineers. He chose to do so in the form of random quotes, only people who are truly knowledgeable and smart can understand the depth of his sayings and teachings.

Here are a few of his quotes -

An engineer who has a girlfriend is truly happy, an engineer who doesn't have a girlfriend tries to fake it!

English is the best language to use while making out... somehow "chalo, dusrey kaksh par jaatey hain" doesn't sound as good as "lets move onto base two".

The real purpose, the final destination of life is to get rich, find a beautiful woman and stay happy... by taking up engineering, I diverged from the path that could lead to any of these.

I now know for sure, that most guys believe that the real purpose of dating a girl is so that one can put up a pic with her on their Orkut profile.

The day an engineer is free of frustration would be the day politics is free from corruption, so forget it!

The most unfortunate man in this world is the one who's beautiful girlfriend dumps him after just one day, and during that one day he didn't even have a camera!

Watching FTV will not help you in meeting hot women in real life.

Voting for a reality show is 2nd worst method of spending your money, the worst is voting for a poll on Aaj Tak!

If the hottest girl in class, looks at the geekiest guy in the class and starts talking to him; there can be only one meaning, she wants his assignments!

If you are in an engineering college and see a beautiful, stunning, gorgeous girl walk right upto you... you're definitely dreaming!

Dressing nicely for an interview wont help you if your resume sucks!

Men have to wear suits, blazers and tuxedos to impress women; women on the other hand have to wear nothing!

Before I hit puberty, my most visited website was Wikipedia, after that it became Chicipedia.

There was once a time when engineers were happy people, then App Mech was born!

Many more such quotes will follow, as and when David Flabbergaster decides to bestow his knowledge for the benefit of engineeringkind!

Dont bathe with your mobile

2009-03-30T08:38:00.000-07:00

"Dont bathe with your mobile"

Firstly no offense to the guy who sent a mail to student@coep; obviously he has great concern for mobile users all over COEP. But this was too funny to ignore. The whole mail is filled with tips as shown under, but the weirdest tip given below is the one which says - "Dont bathe with your mobile".

I mean, seriously, who in the name of Sony Ericsson "bathes with a mobile"!

Anyways, I'll now blog more often about some gems sent on our COEP Mail, it's too irresistible. And please remember kids, as the wise man said - Dont bathe with your mobile!
Also remember, don't try and make phone calls with your soap! :D

Gold

2009-03-28T04:47:00.000-07:00

I am 21 years old, in the past I've participated in a lot of contests, competitions, events etc. On many occasions I've won stuff like certificates, shirts, pen drives, cash awards [i love cash] and even a digi cam. But until the 27th of March 2009, I had never, ever won a Gold medal. On 26th and 27th at TRDDC, TCS' R&D wing, we had a project competition. My project came under the Systems Research Laboratory and was scheduled for demo on the 27th. The demo was complete days ago, and the PPT too was done by the 25th. But it was only on the 26th when I actually found out that there was a Gold-freaking-medal at stake, that i became serious about giving it a shot.

My friends Anshul and Poorva had already got Gold Medals on 26th for their amazing work and Shrirang, Andy and Bagga also got Bronze Medals. Their good wishes really did help my project group, so here's me thanking you all!

So there we were on the 27th, D-Day at TRDDC, on Gudi Padva. And from 1030 am till 1:15 pm we literally were giving our demo and ppt to different groups of people one after the other non-stop. It was a test of stamina, but is on such days that my ability of yapping non-stop comes to the fore.

Teachers from my school days who threatened me with the stick for talking in class, take that ;)

Anyways after the main show in front of the judges was over, which went off very well; we continued to give demos and the ppt for other groups as well. Finally at 4:30 pm we decided to pack up, since the official time was till 4 pm and we were all really exhausted.

After some TP [time pass] with other project groups and friends at TRDDC we were told to head off to the Auditorium for the Prize Distribution ceremony. Now let me tell you all one thing, no matter how well or badly one has performed in a competition, at the time of the Prize Distribution, everyone in their heart of hearts hopes that somehow they win something. It's a fact, everyone has that fantasy of their name being miraculously announced and the applause that follows.

Anyways, I loved the way the ceremony was conducted; it was a great mix of informal fun and the necessary "serious" element it should have. The medals were the really amazing bit. I was actually very impressed with the whole affair.

Once the 3rd and 2nd place awards were given, everyone was kind of tense, no COEP groups had won so far in the Systems Research category. I was also tense, though I didn't show it. I seriously wanted that Gold medal. Then came the final announcement. Our group had one the 1st prize. Mrunal and Akash were all smiles and I was laughing, laughing all the way to the podium. Even when I was given the medal I was laughing. I laughed out of various reasons, firstly coz I was really happy, secondly because my record of winning technical competitions of a serious nature remained intact, thirdly because I finally got a Gold medal and lastly I remembered all that had transpired since Third Year when groups were formed. Every single memory flashed through my mind and I laughed. I remembered those 3 nights in the last two months when i stayed up coding my brains out! I also remembered doing TP at the "katta" near TRDDC with my best friend. I remembered irritating the hell out of employees near my desk at TRDDC by talking and laughing all day with Akash and Mrunal. So many things happened at TRDDC in the past few months, the Gold Medal just went on to make them even more special memories.

I am glad things turned out the way they did. It's been an amazing experience.
The celebrations are still on, I owe quite a few people treats.

7 things I will remember about TRDDC

7 - The first night I coded like mad
6 - Watching Sachin Tendulkar bat while eating at the canteen
5 - The phone number incident
4 - The video Akash and I shot in the lawn
3 - The conversations at the katta
2 - The contest day
1 - The Gold medal

Now I'll conclude this retrospective post about my B Tech project at TRDDC. There's a lot more enjoyment left in these last few weeks of college life and this Gold medal thingy has just given me more reason to celebrate!

Thanks a lot everyone at TRDDC!

The Java Class aka The Laughing Incident

2009-03-25T09:15:00.000-07:00

Ok, this post is a long awaited one, about the famed "Java Class" which was mostly attended by The Losers and from Comp it was just Ketan, Jai The Great and me. It was Akash's long overdue Orkut testimonial for me that triggered these fond memories. The Java class began at the end of our TY 2nd sem. It was mostly a defense mechanism for most of us, who thought ki yaar placement se pehle we gotta do some course at least. Thus began The Java Class. Now what I
remember of the Java class was most certainly the infamous LAUGHING INCIDENT; but I'll add a few details about the class for posterity.
There was this kind soul of a teacher from what i initially believed to be "Sun Java Education", but later found out she was a teacher from some STAR Classes or something. But then it wasnt that big a deal, the books we got were from Sun Java Education, so no harm done.

Now here's how the classes went about, Core Java started bang in the middle of the sem, so it couldn't be held for more than a few weeks. After that we had a break till the end of the sem. During the Core Java lectures, we [by that i mean Hasan, Sameer and Akash] used to be attentive and stuff for a fair amount of time, but once the sem ended we lost all our concentration powers.
In the holidays we were supposed to have the class, all day in our college lab. The maam used to land up at like 8 am or something, expecting our efficient college support staff to be prepared with the labs open and ready [hahaha]. She'd wait there, department locked and all. We students would walk in an hour or so late and chill. The halat was so bad that after some time, she even had to borrow laptops for connecting to the lab projector, one day the class didn't start
until someone with a laptop arrived :D
I was certain that by the end of the "Java Class", that maam would be seriously depressed!

Anyways, the classes suddenly changed hue from being a learning course to being an entertainment centre. Akash and i became good friends during the course of those days. I also met Abba [Abhinit] during the class, we soon realized we had a lot in common, a sense of humor and lukkhagiri instincts to be more precise ;)

Coming back to the point, The Losers and I would sit around, Jai couldn't stand Advanced Java for too long and left the course in true Jai style! Once the class started, for the first 20 mins we would all pretend to be attentive. Then Akash/Hasan and I would make eye contact and we'd suddenly start talking about something or the other which was always funny. Soon the class would go on and we'd keep laughing and talking.

------------------------------

THE LAUGHING INCIDENT

This happened one day, towards to latter half of Advanced Java. In the afternoon, Hasan, I, Akash and Sameer [in seating order] sat in the front row and maam was teaching something about classes in advanced java. Now her slides had some really silly names for the classes, one slide had names like

Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
and so on.

The next slide had names like

January
February
March...

Somehow all 4 of us found this really stupid and funny. It started with me and Akash, both masters of the "silent laugh trick". I was blessed with the ability to hide myself under the cover of the monitor kept in front me by sitting low on my chair. We laughed for 5 straight minutes, it was contagious, soon Hasan and Sameer were laughing as well. Maam was oblivious to all this energetic laughter going on right in front of her. Then we all looked at each other and gave ourselves the "ab bas kar yaar" look and we all controlled our laughter. We all now realize that January February and Monday Tuesday arent exactly the funniest things on Earth, but that day they were.

Then maam changes the slide and the next slide had the dumbest set of Java class names ever

Dog
Cat
Monkey

That was it, we all lost control and started laughing, still we managed the silent laugh; but then, Hasan, let out that shrill laugh for a brief second, the one which manages to slip out. That pushed us all over the edge, we all started laughing hysterically, full volume. The rest of the class, sitting behind us started laughing too, just for the heck of it. Akash actually got off his chair and hid under the comp table ahead of us. No one knew why we were laughing, maam was stunned. She had no clue about what just happened.

She says - "Why are u all laughing?"
"Maam, the classes are named Dog, Cat and Monkey" - was what i would've said, but i was laughing too hard to say anything.

The best moment was when we shut up for a minute, then said a brief "sorry"; then one of us again burst out laughing. Maam was so helpless that she offered us a 5 minute break - "Maam we need at least 10 mins" was our reply.

That was one of the most unforgettable days of The Java Class. We still don't know why we laughed so much that day, but it was legendary. Ever mention The Java Class and that day is the first thing our minds go to.

---------------------------------------------------------

The Aftermath -

Hasan, Sameer and Ketan left for their respective summer Internships for a few weeks. That was when Akash and I abandoned the front rows and settled down at the far end of the lab, we just sat through laughing our heads off, joined on occasion by Abba. That was a really great way to spend the end sem holidays, and a great stress buster for the, then, upcoming Placement Week!

------------------------------

Related stories -

We once used the projector to watch the Aus/SA unforgettable final. Really gr8 use of our college lab :D

Anshul, Poorva and maybe a few more people were the only ones who actually learnt anything during the Advanced Java days. One day Anshul sat next to me; Abba and Akash were there too. I wasn't aware that Anshul thought of me as a "Sajjan". So there we were, suddenly i came up with a funny non-veg joke. After the laughter settled down, Anshul said to me "Yaar, mujhe pata nahi thaa ki tu yeh sab baatein bhi karta hai". Well, Anshul learnt a lot about me then onwards and since then we have become friends too. So i ended up having a great time during those days, Akash and I literally used to come just to chill and crack jokes all day. In the end we got some Advanced Java books as well, which we may use in the future; a certificate which we got after giving a really random test, for which no one prepared and still got like 17/20 minimum. I made quite a few new and gr8 friends in the process and well I do know Advanced Java to a certain extent thanks to my BE project, so no harm done there! A great investment of time.

It was one of the most laughter filled months in our COEP life and it was truly unforgettable! Special thanks to Akash, Jai and Hasan, because of whom I joined The Java Class.

THE END

The College Mail

2009-03-10T07:50:00.000-07:00

Our college mail is officially -

a> A spam exhibition centre

Seriously... people come up with such lame crap, that even after 2 years of having seen our college mail, one can still get surprised. People are stupid enough to sign up with Bharat Matrimony using student@coep as their email id, but they use their full name for signing up, resulting in mails being sent to student@coep saying "Dear, Shilpa XYZkar, thank you for signing up with blah blah blah"

Then we also have the endless set of links sent in mails by various people about sites and events which nobody on earth is interested in.

b> A lost and found announcement tool

This is a slightly new method of tormenting the average user of the college mail, we had people at one time saying stuff like "Lost!!! Lost!!! Lost!!! 2 GB pen drive" etc on the college domain. Now we have the other half of the irritating spectrum with people saying "I found a red colour sweat shirt" etc. It was fine upto a certain extent, but now we have at least 10 such mails per week. I'm now waiting for the circle of insanity to get completed by having mails sent saying - "Thank you, i had lost my pen drive, but i now have got it back", we may then have people sending a reply to that saying - "Dosti mein no sorry, no thank you" and then a reply to that saying "Yes you are right"... sorry, kinda lost control there. But you get the point. It's kinda crazy at times.

c> The central location where people vent their frustration against the college -

Every once in a while we get mails, mostly from anonymous senders like "coepstudentforfreedom@gmail" and then it starts off saying what all stuff sucks in COEP and how we must all "get together" to improve it. That itself is stupid enough, but then it's followed by a barrage of other people, non-anonymous, thankfully who start castigating the anonymous sender with fundas about morality and other philosophical crap. This third thing is actually kinda amusing, so I for one don't mind it as much as the other two things.

The Quest is complete

2009-03-10T01:08:00.001-07:00

The Lord Of The Rings

It is my favorite book of all time, my favorite movie series of all time. I’ve read the book, an insane 17 times and would continue to do so once every year. Thanks to the crazy no. of times that I’ve read the book, I am capable of, at times, quoting lines from the book in real life situations. E.g. when a couple of years back there was this whole, “Sachin must retire” bullshit campaign after India lost a few matches, I wrote this blog post and quoted an LOTR favorite – “Faithless is he who says farewell when the road darkens”!

Fresh after one of my readings of the book series, I end up having a hangover of the old English style which JRR Tolkien has used in the books. There was this one instance when I irritated the hell out of a teacher in 12^th standard when she asked me some shit formula in Chem II which I had no idea about, so I said, “To this question… the answer… I know not”. She got so freaked out, she just asked me to sit down and carried on.

Anyways, I have to thank my brother’s friend PL Kashyap, it was he who introduced me to The Lord Of The Rings. Since then I’ve gone on to having finished all of Tolkien’s works. But I would say one thing, my fanatic love for this “trilogy” [Tolkien buffs will point out that it wasn’t a trilogy, but what the hell, I’ll call it a trilogy for simplicity], has its roots in the fantastic movie series directed by Peter Jackson. Each movie was a masterpiece of acting, direction, dialogues, action, drama, and exceptionally awesome special effects. The journey of The Ring-bearer and The Fellowship from Rivendell to Mordor has been shown so brilliantly that one can safely say that if Tolkien were to have directed this movie, he’d have made it exactly the same.

Other fantasy books off late which have been made into movies haven’t had the same success as The Lord Of The Rings, maybe because the creators of the movies aren’t exactly fans of the books. That explains why the Harry Potter movies haven’t been regarded as good enough movie versions of some great books. The Eragon book series isn’t exactly the greatest series to have been written, but the movie was definitely one of the worst movies to have been made. The kind of effort that must’ve gone into making LOTR as a movie series can only be imagined, but apart from the exceptionally good music score, or special effects; the one thing that sets LOTR apart is the amazing ensemble cast [which was acknowledged by an Oscar]. The casting and acting has been more than perfect. Gandalf played by Sir Ian Mckellen was according to me one of the best books-to-screen depictions of any fantasy character.

I am writing this post, fresh after completing my quest of watching all 3 extended DVD versions of the movies, consecutively. I had wanted to do this for a long time, and finally managed it in the fag end of my B Tech days. Another awesome memory to add to my engineering days.

Thank you, JRR Tolkien, Peter Jackson and unknown dude who burned the DVD’s for me!

For those who haven’t yet watched this masterpiece of film making, here are a few snapshots which may make you want to see it immediately.

Bhor Bhayi and Laaga Chunari Mein Daag

2009-03-04T07:55:00.000-08:00

I'm not exactly an expert on Indian classical music, sadly, I'm quite the opposite. But this song from Delhi 6, called Bhor Bhayi reminded me of an amazing classical number called Laga Chunari Mein Daag. I heard that song a year ago and it totally blew me away, insanely awesome.
I somehow haven't had the time to hear classical music, but what little I have heard has made me promise myself that I'll definitely take out time in the future to hear a lot more of it.

Meanwhile check out the song I mentioned above, the last half of the song is mind blowing. I don't know how many of you will actually like it, but I love this track. Manna Dey, I salute thee.
Once again I salute A R Rahman for using such an old and forgotten track in Delhi 6, I also noticed how even Shreya Ghoshal struggles at a few notes in the song to match Ustad Bade Ghulam Ali Khan.

Anyways, just thought of posting this to remind me in the future to come good on my promise; lest I forget.

Dil Gira Dafatan Lyrics - Delhi 6

2009-03-01T14:04:00.000-08:00

Dil Gira Dafatan from the album Delhi 6, is my favorite song of the year so far. Prasoon Joshi has penned some amazing lyrics for this track. A R Rahman has filled this song with mesmerizing melody that only he is capable of creating. There are some songs which are made for the charts and then there are songs made for the heart. This one is a soul stirring song that is a must-hear.

Dil Gira Dafatan Lyrics

Dil mera dil mera dil mera
Dil mera…aaaaaaaaaaaaa
Dil mera dil mera…

Dil gira kahin par dafatan,
Dil gira kahin par dafatan,
Jaane magar yeh nayan,
Teri khamosh zulfon ki gehraaiyaan hai jahan,
Dil mera uljha hua hai wahin kho gaya,
Tu magar hai bekhabar, hai bekhabar,
Dil gira kahin par dafatan,
Kyu gunj rahi hai dhadkan,
Jaane magar yeh nayan..

Sipiyon ke honth se,
Moti chalak rahe hain,
Gazlon ki sohabat mein,
Geet bhi behek rahi hai,
Samunder lehron ki lehron ki,
Chadar odh ke so raha hai,
Par mein jaagu, ek khumari,
Ek nasha sa, ek nasha sa ho raha hai,
Tu magar hai bekhabar, hai bekhabar..
Dil gira kahin par dafatan,
Kyu gunj rahi hai dhadkan,
Jaane magar yeh nayan,
Khushbu mein lipte mausam,
Teri khamosh zulfon ki gehraaiyaan hai jahan,
Dil mera uljha hua hai wahin kho gaya,
Tu magar hai bekhabar, hai bekhabar,
Dil gira kahin par dafatan..

Movie: Delhi-6 (2009)
Music Director: A R Rahman
Director: Rakeysh Omprakash Mehra
Lyrics: Prasoon Joshi

One hopes that this is just the start of another great A R Rahman year.